Dirty Little Angel

“I’m sorry about that.”

“What you sorry for, nigga? Crown had it coming eventually, but I’m just sad that it had to be you. But you just watch your back out there. Harlem is still loose and he’s a dangerous man to bump heads with.”

“Yeah, I know. And I’m taking your advice and skatin’ off for a minute and taking Chaos wit’ me.”

Magic nodded. “You be safe, nigga. Start over with something better for yourself.”

YB nodded. It was a complicated moment for both men. They had love for each other and to depart was something YB didn’t want to do.

“I don’t need to know where you’re going, just leave. And don’t worry about me, young’un. I survived over fifty years on these streets; I think I know how to handle myself.” Magic smiled.

YB smiled back. He gave Magic dap and embraced him. “I always got love for you, Magic,” he whispered.

“Go and do you. I know your father would be proud of you. You’re his seed so carry his name out there with some fuckin’ respect, YB.”

YB nodded and walked out the door to make preparations for his trip to New York.

****

YB crossed the George Washington Bridge around midnight. The shine from the city’s skyline was new to him and he was somewhat stunned at how beautiful the city looked.

Chaos was still asleep with her head resting against the passenger window. YB had “What We Do” track by Philadelphia Freeway playing and navigated his way through the thick traffic, heading toward the Cross Bronx Expressway. He was so new to the city that the curves and turns, the bridges, and the dense traffic at such a late hour had his mind spinning. He knew once he got on the Cross Bronx Expressway that he needed to wake up Chaos for further directions. This was her town, her place of birth, and she knew more about the Bronx than he would ever know.

After about a half hour of being stuck in traffic, YB finally got onto the Cross Bronx Expressway, carefully following the signs for route.

“Chaos, wake up. Wake up, baby,” YB said as he nudged her gently.

Chaos twisted and turned for a short moment and then opened her eyes to New York—the Bronx, exactly. She smiled and peered out at the city. It had been so long for her that she somewhat felt intimidated. The farther YB drove into the Bronx, though, the more familiar she became with the city again.

She told YB to get off at Jerome Avenue and they headed north.

“We need to find somewhere to stay for the night. I gotta rest,” YB stated. He was tired. Since the night of the shooting, he hadn’t had any sleep. He had been running around Philly trying to get his shit right before leaving.

“A’ight, just find a motel to stay at,” Chaos said.

Within fifteen minutes they checked in at Howard Johnson on Boston Road. The place was low-key and definitely far away from Philly. With the money packed away in a small duffel bag, the two settled into the quiet room.

The room only had one bed and cable TV. YB tossed the bag on the bed and went to the window where he observed the busy Bronx streets from the fourth floor window. He removed his gun and tossed it onto the bed next to the duffel bag.

“I need a shower,” Chaos said, undressing.

YB turned to watch her strip naked and walk into the bathroom. He admired her tight shape and felt bad for Chaos. Like him, she had a hard life.

YB poured the money from the duffel bag onto the bed. He had enough money to live on and to invest into something outside of Philly. He even thought about establishing himself in the drug trade in New York, but without Rufus as his right hand, it would be hard for him. He needed muscle and the Bronx was very unfamiliar to him.

The motel room was quiet except for the shower running in the bathroom. YB was deep in thought. He let out a grave sigh and asked himself, What the fuck do I do now?

26

Chaos let the hot shower cascade down her body. She kept her head down and let her tears mix in with the steamy water. She was grateful to be out of Philly but Sweet was supposed to be with her. Sweet wasn’t supposed to be dead.

She tried to wash the pain, the hurt, and the transgressions she suffered from her skin—scrubbing and scraping every inch of her body with a wet, soapy washcloth. She thought about the tricks that she fucked and sucked. She thought about the beatings that she endured from the hands of Crown. She thought about Toy-T raping her and videotaping her sexual acts with his friends. Her life was a living hell. She cried under the flowing shower, hoping YB didn’t hear her.

The bathroom was saturated with hot steam. The mist blocked any reflection in the mirrors and a thick haze lingered in every corner of the bathroom, making it look like a sauna. Chaos wanted the water hotter because she felt so dirty.

The bathroom door opened and YB walked in quietly. He heard Chaos sobbing through the door. He walked toward the shower, removed his boxers, and got in the shower.