Close Obsession (The Krinar Chronicles 2)
Page 80
“Why didn’t you tell me?” Mia asked, her heart skipping a beat at his words. “Why didn’t you tell me how you felt earlier?”
The smile left his face, his expression turning serious. “Because I was frightened,” he admitted darkly. “Because I had never felt like that before, and I didn’t know how to cope with it. For the first time in centuries, I was driven by emotion, instead of reason, and I didn’t always make the wisest choices when it came to you. I wanted to have you, and I couldn’t think of anything beyond that need, that craving. I wasn’t sufficiently patient, and I ended up scaring you . . . and then you got involved with the Resistance as a result. I loved you, and all you seemed to want is to have me permanently out of your life. Even later, when you told me you loved me, I wasn’t sure if you truly felt that way, or if you were just playing along, giving me what I wanted –”
Mia shook her head, unable to believe her ears. He’d always seemed so invulnerable, and the realization that she’d had the power to hurt him all along was truly humbling. “No, Korum,” she murmured, raising her hand to stroke his face. “I fell in love with you back in New York. Even though I thought you wanted to harm my kind, even though I was afraid of ending up as your sex slave, I still fell for you . . . And I can’t live without you now –”
He drew in a deep breath and pressed her tighter against him, burying his face in her hair. “And I can’t live without you, my darling,” he whispered, “I don’t think I can ever let you go, not anymore . . .”
“Then why did you? Why did you try to let me go yesterday?”
He pulled back, looking at her again. “Because I realized I couldn’t force you to love me, to want to be with me.” A bitter smile appeared on his lips. “I could keep you with me until the end of time, but I couldn’t make you love me. It was no longer enough, you see, just to have you. I wanted more – I wanted you to love me freely. I thought you would rejoice at being made immortal, but you were upset instead . . . And I knew then that I couldn’t do that to you, couldn’t make you stay with me against your will –”
“Oh Korum,” Mia whispered, “it’s not against my will. It hasn’t been against my will for a long time . . .”
His expression softened again. “I’m glad,” he said quietly, brushing some hair off her face. “I want you to be happy with me. I never meant to make you feel like a slave. I just couldn’t bear the thought of anything happening to you if I put off the procedure until you’d had a chance to acclimate to Lenkarda and get used to being with me. I thought I was giving you something you would want . . .”
“I do. I do want it,” Mia told him sincerely. “How could you even doubt it? You’ve given me a priceless gift, and I didn’t mean to imply otherwise . . . But, Korum, can you please promise me one thing?”
He studied her with a watchful gaze. “What?”
“Can you please never do anything to me without my consent again? Even if you think it’s for the best, even if you’re not sure I’ll agree to it?”
He hesitated for a second, and then nodded reluctantly. She could see how much it cost him to make that concession, the extent to which it went against his nature. But he had now given her his word, and she knew that he would keep it.
“Thank you,” she told him, caressing his shoulder. “This means a lot to me.”
He smiled and leaned toward her, giving her a gentle kiss.
When he pulled away, Mia made a serious face and asked him, “Do you know what else would mean a lot to me right now?”
He looked a little wary. “What?”
“Some yummy breakfast,” she told him, and watched his face light up with a dazzling smile.
* * *
On Friday morning, they left to go back to Lenkarda.
The rest of their visit to Florida had been uneventful, and her family had been sad to see them leave. Korum promised to bring Mia back for a couple of days before the end of summer, which earned him a tearful hug from her mom and a sincere thank-you from her dad. Marisa had been particularly emotional, thanking Korum again for everything he’d done for them and then blushing fiercely when he gave her a kiss on the cheek as goodbye.
“I’m going to miss them,” Mia told him as they drove toward the airport where he was planning to create their ship. “I really wish I could see them more often.”
“Yo
u’ll be able to,” Korum said, keeping his eyes on the road. “Once I’m sure that it’s completely safe, there’s no reason why you can’t drop in every couple of weeks or so. It doesn’t take that long to get here from Lenkarda –”
“From Lenkarda?” Mia inquired delicately. “I thought we were going back to New York in the fall . . .”
Korum sighed. “If you still want that, then yes.”
“Why wouldn’t I?”
He shrugged. “You don’t really need the degree if you’re going to continue working at Saret’s lab. It’s not like you’ll learn anything more in school than you would staying in Lenkarda –”
“Is that what you’re hoping?” Mia asked. “That I would decide not to go back to school?”
“I prefer Lenkarda to New York,” he admitted, “but I don’t mind if you decide to finish college. I know it’s still important to you, and I promised that I would bring you back for the school year. Nine months – that’s nothing in the grand scheme of things, and if it gives you peace of mind . . .”
For the first time, Mia thought seriously about the possibility of not finishing school. Korum was right: what she was learning at her apprenticeship was head and shoulders above anything the university had to teach her. And if Lenkarda were to be her home, a college degree was meaningless. Would Saret allow her to return to the lab after such a long absence? She would hate to lose this opportunity in order to write a few more papers and study for a few more exams. She needed to discuss this with her boss and soon, Mia decided.