“I’m announcing my retirement in December.” Alonzo watched as surprise, confusion, then disappointment swept across Deputy Juan Ramirez’s tan features.
The two men sat in Alonzo’s office Wednesday morning drinking coffee. Juan sat in one of the gray visitor’s chairs on the other side of his desk. He’d worked with the younger man for three years, since he’d been elected sheriff. In that time, they’d become friends.
“Is this your April Fool’s joke? It’s not funny.” Juan cradled his white coffee mug against his torso.
“It’s not April Fool’s Day.” It was only Wednesday, March twenty-fifth. The muscles twisting in Alonzo’s gut eased as he thought of his retirement. “And I’m not joking. I’m serious.”
“I can’t believe you’re planning to retire. Are you sure?”
“I’m sixty-six years old. I’ve earned it.” Alonzo lowered his gaze to his coffee. He was using one of the sheriff’s office’s mismatched ceramic mugs. This one was black. It was easier not to be distracted by coffee stains in your mug when you couldn’t see them.
“Sixty-six isn’t dead, Sheriff.” Juan straightened on the chair. “Why do you want to retire?”
“I thought you’d be happy.” Alonzo grinned at the deputy, whose youthful features belied his thirty-seven years of age. “Now you won’t have to campaign against me to remove this old man from office and make room for more youthful energy and ideas.”
“I don’t want to be sheriff.” Juan snorted a laugh.
“You should consider it.” Alonzo sobered. “You’d make a good one.”
“We have a good one.” Juan spread his arms. “Marrying Doreen doesn’t mean you have to give up your career.”
“I’m ready to start this new chapter of my life.”
“What’s in it?”
“Making myself worthy of Doreen.”
“What do you mean?”
He’d said more than he’d intended. But maybe another law enforcement officer could understand. Alonzo settled his gaze on a corner of his office and let his mind play scenes from his past. “Doreen has spent her whole life helping to build this community. She’s served on committees to raise money for the schools, the volunteer fire department. She led the Sesquicentennial Celebration Committee.”
“She pushed for a lot of improvements in the town, including the lights in Freedom Park.” Juan shifted on his chair. “But what does that have to do with you?”
“She’s helped people.” Alonzo heaved a sigh. “I’ve hurt people, a lot of them.”
“You’ve protected communities.” Juan’s tone was firm.
“At what cost?” Alonzo wiped his hand across his brow. Gun battles, screams, death, and blood—that’s what he had to live with, thanks to his past.
“I know you’ve seen a lot more action than I have. But I also know that everything you’ve done was to protect people in the communities you served.”
“There’s blood on my hands, Juan.” Alonzo’s voice was low. “Until I wash them clean, I won’t feel worthy of someone like Doreen.”
“You’re a good man, Sheriff.” Juan’s words were adamant. “I know that and so does Doreen.”
“Doreen doesn’t know about my past.” Alonzo sighed again. He should have confessed everything to her before he’d proposed. That would have been the honorable thing to do before asking her to spend the rest of her life with him. But he hadn’t had the courage to take the risk.
“Then tell her.” Juan shrugged his broad shoulders. “You’ll see that her opinion of you won’t change. She loves you.”
Alonzo’s gaze slid away. Would she still love him once she knew about his past?
CHAPTER 4
“So, who’s going to sit in my chair?” Ms. Helen settled onto one of the four crimson red cushioned seats ringing the small honey wood circular conversation table in Dr. Foster Gooden’s office.
It was the last Friday morning in March. Benita had joined Foster and Ms. Helen at Trinity Falls University to discuss the endowed chemistry chair a wealthy alumna was gifting to the university in Ms. Helen’s honor.
Benita sat beside her great-aunt and allowed her gaze to roam the room. The vice president for academic affairs’ office was modest in size, masculine in appearance, and compulsive in order. A thin layer of anxiety covered the office as though all was not as well with the university as the administration would have you believe.