He rested an elbow on his thigh and dropped his face into his hand. “This is the only place I can keep constant watch on her. The only place where I have control over what happens. And now I’m not even confident I can keep her safe here anymore.”
The sight of such a strong man weakened by the depth of his love for his daughter shattered Everly’s barriers. She moved close and pressed her hand to his back, then slid it higher, to squeeze the back of his neck.
“I know how much you love her,” she said. “I’m sorry I was so harsh this morning.”
He huffed a laugh. “You have every right. You’ve probably been in just as much danger here as you were in Mogadishu.”
She smiled and scored her fingernails over his scalp, something she’d learned he liked the night before. He sighed and clasped a hand on her bare thigh. The heat radiated up her leg and deep into her body.
“I just meant you need to put an end to this threat,” Everly said. “Neither of you can live the life you want with this hanging over your head.”
“I know.” He shook his head. “I just…fuck, I don’t know what to do.” He turned his head and looked directly at her, his soul open and vulnerable. “I can’t lose her. I, seriously, cannot lose her.”
Everly couldn’t stand to see him so wrought over the possibility. She leaned in to hug him and ended up kissing him instead. When she pulled back, Austin caught her face in his free hand and pulled her in for another kiss. And another. And another.
She forced herself to pull back and pressed her forehead to his to catch her breath and realign her thoughts. With a soft laugh, she repeated his words from the night before. “Just this once, remember?”
“No.” A little smile lifted his lips. “I have no idea what you’re talking about.”
He wrapped one arm low on her waist and rolled toward her, easily moving her up on the bed. And just as naturally pressing his hips between her thighs. Her heart squeezed, and desire pumped through her veins.
Austin rested on his forearms and stroked her face with his knuckles. “I don’t think I’ve thanked you properly for taking such good care of Bella.”
Damn, he felt good. All hard and warm. Open and sweet. “That’s my job.”
“Beating off bad guys and running from gunfire aren’t in your job description.” He met her gaze directly, and a soft look drifted through his eyes, one that made Everly both panicky and thrilled. “You’ve been amazing. More than I could have ever hoped for.”
He lowered his head and kissed her again. Everly welcomed the distraction. She heard a whole different meaning in those last comments. Meaning she didn’t have the luxury of investigating. And that broke her heart a little.
Austin hummed with desire and pushed his hands into her hair. Cradling her head, he took the kiss deeper. His tongue stroked hers, warm and strong. He was patient, as if he relished every moment with her and wasn’t rushed to get to the hardcore stuff. That sensation of being truly desired, inside and out, snuck in again. Most men she slept with thought she was sexy in a badass way. But Austin didn’t know how badass she truly was, so his desire affected her in ways she’d never imagined. Ways that pried her heart open and made her want things she’d never wanted before.
But those were things she couldn’t have. The moment he found out about her, he’d either hate her or…
No, there was no or. He’d simply hate her.
Her heart broke a little more.
To stem the surge of disappointment and loss, even though she hadn’t lost him yet, Everly wrapped her arms around his neck, curled the fabric of his T-shirt into her hands, and pulled it over his head. She tossed it aside as he kissed her again. But something caught her eye, and she turned her head. Then pushed him back by the shoulders and took her first full sweep of his body since the shooting. “Holy. Shit.”
He smirked and looked down. “Pretty, right?”
Her gaze scoured the wicked halos of bruises marring his chest and abdomen. Purple, green, brown, angry red, it was a kaleidoscope of horror. She’d seen them before—on her teammates and herself when they’d escaped death. And remembering just how close Austin had come to deat
h today—within inches, if the bruise locations were any indication—whipped up a new wave of emotion.
“Jesus Christ, Austin.” She scooted back and touched a particularly raw-looking bruise right over his heart. “How are you even moving?”
“I have a high dose of meds in me.” He grinned. “So you’d better take advantage of me while you can.”
He kissed her again, hungrier now. Everly felt raw and vulnerable in a way she didn’t understand. Needed to feel him inside her with a passion that made the night before seem like embers to an inferno.
Austin must have tasted her desire. He groaned into her mouth, then broke the kiss to reach over and flip off the bedside lamp. “We need to get you some real window shades.” His knees flanked her hips, and he eased back to grab the hem of her tank. He pulled her top off and raked her naked upper body with a look so hungry, her body heat spiked. “Definitely need window shades.”
He planted his hands on the bed at her shoulders and bent to press a kiss to the center of her chest. Everly shivered and combed her fingers through his hair to cover the physical show of vulnerability. “You scared the shit out of me today.”
He opened his eyes and looked up at her. The blue light of the television flashed over his handsome face. “Then we’re even, because when I couldn’t move and those bullets were just feet from you and Bella—” He made a dark sound in his throat and shook his head, then let his lips fall back to her body. “I really just want to get lost in you.”
Good idea. She was ready to get lost as well. Ready to put this horrible day behind her. And even more ready to get this sexy man inside her.