“Because if we’re seen doing whatever it is we’re doing,” I explain, “I won’t be hard to identify in a Falcon’s Well cheer uniform.”
He smiles to himself and looks back at the road. “You won’t be seen.”
I take in a deep breath and reach over and turn up the radio, trying to drown out the worry in my head as Breaking Bejamin’s “So Cold” plays.
I try to act like a badass, but honestly, I’m nervous as hell.
I should’ve told him no this morning. I’d stopped writing on the walls, and doing anything more illegal would be risking too much. I have acceptance letters to NYU, Cornell, and Dartmouth. Like I’m going to jeopardize that simply because I’m infatuated with him and will use any excuse to be close to him.
Actually it was hard to refuse him anything while he was inside me. I would’ve told him I’d tattoo his name on my neck if he wanted.
He’d probably love that. I glance over at him, laughing inside at the idea. His brown hair, wispy and sticking up a little, is pushed forward, and I stare at his mouth, remembering the warmth of the smooth metal ring grazing the doz
ens of places he’s kissed on my body.
I suddenly want to know everything. What he was like as a kid. What his favorite kinds of music are. Where he goes when he wants some peace and quiet and whom does he go to when he needs to talk.
Who does he love? Who’s there for him? Who knows him best?
Who knows him better than me? I can’t help the jealousy I feel at that thought. He has an entire life and history with people who aren’t me.
I chew on the corner of my mouth, feeling so many things I know I shouldn’t say.
But I want to.
“I like you,” I tell him, looking down, my voice quiet.
I see him turn his head toward me, not saying anything.
“You said some nice things last Friday night,” I go on, “and I wanted you to know—in case you don’t already—that I actually kind of like you.” I raise my eyes, seeing him watch me with something I can’t read going on in his eyes. “I know I can be…me. I don’t get sappy, and I don’t give up what’s going on in my head a lot. It’s hard for me.” I pause, feeling a little more resolute. I want him to know. “But yeah, I like you.”
I know it’s not much, but it’s a lot for me, and I hope he knows that. Admitting I like him makes me vulnerable, and that’s not usually a card I ever give up. Not anymore.
Because, to be honest, I don’t just like him. It’s more than that. I think about him.
I miss him when he’s not around.
It’ll hurt if he has to leave as suddenly as he appeared.
He’s quiet, and the heat of embarrassment blankets my skin. Awesome. Good going, Ryen. Maybe all he liked about you was that you weren’t clingy, and now you’re acting like you’re in love with him.
“When are we going to be there?” I ask, my tone curt as I try to change the subject.
I watch as he slowly pulls over to the side of the road and parks next to a wall of trees.
“We’re here now,” he answers.
I peer around the hedge, taking a better look, and then dart my eyes around, taking in the quiet, spacious neighborhood.
“This is Trey’s house,” I point out, my guard definitely up now.
He nods, taking off his seatbelt. “There’s something of mine in there. A family heirloom.” He gestures to Trey’s house on the right. “And I need it back.”
“What are you talking about? Why would Trey have something of yours?”
He shakes his head. “Not Trey.”
“What?”