“Tony helped.” Mom’s eyes sparkled at the mention of his name. “That’s why we sent the cart down for you.”
“It’s a nice night for it.” I juggled Olivia to my hip. “Is Valerie here, yet?”
“Mhmm,” Mom said, her smile a little more forced than before. Though she got along with Valerie on the surface, she knew the history between us and was firmly on my side, despite the fact that the war was over. “And Rudy, and, oh, the other one. The Scottish one.”
“Ian is here?” Neil grinned at that. “I haven’t heard from him in ages.”
“Well, it will be nice to get caught up.” I gestured to the door that led out to the long, gallery-style hallway. “Go on. I’ll be along in a minute.”
He gave me an uncertain look, but his glee at the prospect of rejoining his social life overcame any reservations.
Mom waited a beat after he left to ask, “So? How is he really?”
“He’s got a way to go,” I said, shrugging the shoulder that wasn’t helping hold Olivia. I leaned my nose into her sweet blonde curls. “But we all do.”
“I’m so proud of you,” Mom said, smiling fondly at Olivia.
“Why? Because I didn’t fall apart or give up?” I’d meant for it to be a joke, but what I really wanted was confirmation.
“Yeah,” Mom answered, as though it were obvious. “You’ve taken on some pretty big responsibilities, and you’re handling them all better than I ever would.”
“I don’t know that I had a choice,” I admitted. “I love him, Mom. And I love Olivia. This is my family, and somewhere, from some crazy person, I got this idea that family is important.”
Mom hugged me and kissed my forehead. “I have to go stir things. If anything burns, I’ll have to endure a lot of under-his-breath comments from snooty Rudy.”
I laughed at her rhyme and shook my head then carried Olivia out of the kitchen. I nearly collided with Valerie, who snatched her granddaughter out of my arms.
“Oh, I’ve missed you,” she murmured against Olivia’s cheek as she kissed it, and I almost laughed at how deeply I sympathized with that feeling.
In the living room, everyone crowded around Neil. Nobody had a drink in their hand that wasn’t a can of pop or a bottled water. For a group that socialized with alcohol as much as they did, it wasn’t a coincidence. I was truly grateful.
Valerie stood in front of Laurence, not leaning on him, but definitely close, with Olivia snuggled in her arms. Maybe it said something bad about me that I liked Valerie so much better now that she had someone in her life and wasn’t competing with me for Neil, but I was glad she looked genuinely happy. Ian stood with them, Penny by his side; they both positively glowed in each other’s presence, but Ian’s broad smile fixed on Neil. Everyone was so happy to see him, even Tony, who lingered awkwardly a few steps away. It had to be weird, becoming a part of a family you worked for.
Rudy stood at Neil’s side, a hand affectionately placed on his shoulder, gripping it and gently shaking him. “If you ever do that again, I will kill myself, too, just to come kick your ass in hell.”
If anyone could joke about suicide and make Neil laugh, it was Rudy. Neil smiled and looked down bashfully. These moments of boyish charm were what I lived for lately. They reassured me that everything was going to be all right.
“I must admit, I’m a bit embarrassed.” Neil scratched the back of his neck. “I feel as though you should all be shouting at me.”
“Shouting for joy that you didn’t pull it off,” Ian said.
“Should we really be joking about this?” Laurence asked, looking distinctly uncomfortable. “I don’t want to be the one to bring down the party, but this was serious. Are you all right, Neil?”
“Never better,” he answered. Then he paused, and he did get serious. “I shouldn’t say that. Of course there have been times that were better.”
My gaze cut to Valerie. She made herself very busy adjusting the straps of Olivia’s sundress.
“This is just how we are, Laurence,” Rudy said with an exasperated noise. “If something happens and you should cry about it, it’s better to laugh and get the fuck over it.”
Neil would never be able to laugh off Emma’s death, but I agreed with Rudy. In Neil’s case, tragedy had been averted. If we needed to laugh, it was safe, now.
“Hey, guys,” Mom called from the dining room door. “Dinner’s ready.”
As we moved from the living room, Rudy leaned down to tell me, “Your mother needs a nail intervention. She looks like the claw machine in an arcade.”
“If you don’t shut up, you’re not having any scalloped potatoes,” I hissed.
He crossed himself. “Forgive me my trespass. But I would have never let my momma walk around with two garden rakes on the ends of her arms.”