I fist my palm tight, letting my nails dig into the skin as I bite my cheek, to make sure I am really standing here and not in some deranged nightmare.
“You’d abort your child because of your reputation in your firm?” I stare at her in disbelief.
“Oh, for fuck’s sake. Don’t act so self-righteous. You have no idea what it’s like.”
“Maybe I don’t, but let’s say you’re telling the truth and that is my baby. I have rights, too.”
“I’m pretty sure it’s my body.”
That’s when I know. She finally gives a tell. Whether or not this was the plan all along, she thinks she has me trapped. My lawyer mind finally kicks in, and I glare at her, crossing my arms. This woman is not going to trample all over me.
“I’ll be contacting my personal lawyer today. Once I speak with him and have a plan of action, one of us will contact you regarding a paternity test. Until then, I can’t tell you what to do, but I’d tread lightly, Sasha. If I find out you are telling the truth, and you do anything to hurt this child, your reputation is the last thing you’ll need to worry about.”
“Don’t threaten me, Ren. I’m not scared of you.”
Un-fucking-believable. So many snappy remarks pop into my head, but I have enough sense to keep my mouth shut. I walk to the door and open it, motioning it’s time for her to leave. She grabs her purse and storms past, anger radiating off her. She almost clears the area when she turns, walking back to Gail’s desk and dropping a business card.
“Gail, I presume?” She looks between Gail and me with a nasty scowl. “You’ll want to make sure he takes my calls and visits from now on. I’m not going to be shoved under the rug like a piece of trash.” She turns on her heel and stalks out.
Gail leaps up, coming into my office and shutting the door behind her. “She got in through the temp at the front. Angie is out sick today. I’m sorry I wasn’t here to intercept her.”
“It’s okay.” I fall down in my chair and run my hands through my hair. A headache starts to pound behind my eyelids.
Gail bends and places the fallen grainy photograph on my desk, but stays quiet, waiting for me to speak.
I can’t find the words because Sasha’s announcement keeps replaying. Suddenly, Bizzy’s face pops in my mind, along with the memory of our conversation last week about children. Her fear of not being able to conceive weighs heavily on her, and I vowed to spend the rest of my life proving to her that she was enough.
I’d thought about it long and hard, knowing I’d move mountains to have every specialist and professional in the world work with Bizzy to help her have our child. But in the end, if it didn’t happen, we’d adopt, and I’d be happy. Because the one thing I know I can’t live without is her.
Knowing there’s a chance that Sasha is pregnant will destroy Bizzy. Not only the fact that another woman is having my child, it’s Sasha.
The gravity of the situation starts to hit.
I break out in a cold sweat, imagining the look on Bizzy’s face and the devastation in her eyes. My stomach turns, and I drop to my knees, lurching for the trash bin. I stare at the black plastic until the wave passes and feel Gail put a damp cloth on the back of my neck.
“It’s going to be okay, Shaw. We’ll figure this out.”
I say a silent prayer, hoping she’s right.
Caldwell Banks has been a friend since law school and is probably one of the only men I’d trust with my situation right now. He’s only a year older, and like me, he’s built a solid reputation on his ability to get shit done.
Unlike me, he’s been with the same woman since college. He married her the month after we graduated law school and immediately started a family. Pictures clutter his office of his wife and children, and I pick one up as I sip my scotch.
“Leah never ages. Still beautiful,” I say, referring to his wife. “Not sure what she’s still doing with you.”
“Are you kidding? Look at me.” He points to himself and gives me his best smile.
“My point exactly.” I place the picture back on the corner of his desk.
“Ouch. Did you insist we meet immediately to insult me?”
“Nah, I need your advice. Tell me everything you know about paternity tests.”
He dives into his knowledge of what courts have ruled in the past and gives me a rundown of hypotheticals that I already know. Hell, my clients dodge pregnancy claims all the time. He’s helped me before. While he talks, I start pacing, listening close in case he tells me something I haven’t researched yet.
“Shaw, what’s really going on? Surely you know all these answers.”
“Yes, but this time it’s different. This time—” I throw back the rest of my drink and go to his sidebar to pour another. I need the liquid courage to even say it.