The clock on the dashboard reads eight fo
rty-five am. Plenty of time to study before my real day starts.
Presley
I walk up the front porch of my childhood home and sigh in disappointment. There’s a creaking to my right, and I hang my head in exhaustion. This is not the way I hoped my night would end.
“Hey, Pres, how was your date?”
“Are you waiting up for me, Simon?”
“Nope, just enjoying a beer. Want one?” He points to the small cooler at his feet.
I grab one and join him on the porch swing. We sway back and forth in silence for a few minutes, him waiting me out.
“It sucked,” I tell him what he already knows. “I hoped this guy would be different.”
“Why would he be different when you keep picking the same guy in different clothing?”
“Simon!”
“No, really, the last three guys you’ve gone out with have the exact same pedigree but different names and different clothes. They’re all boring, somewhat self-centered, and way too reserved.”
“There’s nothing wrong with being reserved. I like reserved. It means they think before they act. Decision making skills are important in a relationship.”
He starts to choke and spits his beer out. I pat him on the back, and he shakes his head, trying to catch his breath.
“You realize you just explained your dating life as if you were picking out carpet. Completely emotionless.”
I try to argue, but it’s useless because he’s right.
“I guess I’m boring. I don’t need any high thrills. Stability is important.”
“Stability is safe, and you’ve played it safe forever.”
“Safe is responsible. You and Johnny are the spontaneous ones. You two live for the action. I’m perfectly content with ease.”
“Don’t do that, Presley. Don’t let it be enough for you.”
“Why?”
“Because you’re better than that. You’re an amazing woman with so much to offer. I’m scared you’re wasting a chance at love by always playing the safety card. I’d like to see your face light up when the man of your dreams walks in and sends your heart soaring. Haven’t you ever heard of butterflies fluttering and all that shit?”
I sip my beer and look into the darkness. “It’s not going to happen for me.”
“Not if you keep picking your dates at ‘Geeks R Us’.”
“No, I mean, I’m not sure I’m equipped to handle anything but boring. This way there are no surprises.”
“Jesus, listen to you. Do you pencil in sex, too, just to make sure both of you free up the time?”
I wince in discomfort. One, it’s bad form to discuss your sex life with your brother. Two, he doesn’t know he perfectly described my sex life with my last boyfriend. He was more structured than I am and liked to know when I planned to stay the night. It was a part of his schedule. There wasn’t an impulsive bone in his body.
“I can see by your expression I hit a nerve, so don’t answer that question.”
“Simon, why are you riding my ass tonight?”
“Because you’re my baby sister, and for the last ten years, you’ve taken care of everyone else’s needs. I’m afraid you’ve bypassed too many of life’s spur of the moments. It’s time to reach for what you deserve.