Finding Our Course (Finding our Way 3)

I strip and sit in the tub, turning on the shower and letting the hot water pelt down on me. Rocking back and forth, I curl up and wail into my knees. My whole body tremors, and I let the stress, anxiety, and fear pour out.

What will happen if Bryce truly doesn’t remember me? What if he has no memory at all? His parents, his career, his friends? Questions fly around in my head until my ears are ringing and my heart thunders in my chest. Everything on my body hurts. The little bit of food in my stomach comes up, and I rush to the toilet, heaving violently until there’s nothing left.

When I’m co

nfident I can stand, I move under the spray and go through the motions of washing my hair and body. Desperation and rejection spread through me. As pathetic as it sounds, I can’t imagine a life without Bryce loving me.

“Devon? You okay in there?” Dave calls through the door.

“Yes, I’m getting out now.” I cut off the water and step out, forcing myself to sound normal.

“I’m going to step into the hallway and make a call if you need me.”

“Take your time.”

The door to the room shuts, so I hurry to get dressed. A few minutes later, I hear it open and close again, so I slow down, hoping my splotchy cheeks will go back to normal. The voice on the other side of the door stops me all together and sends a chill down my spine.

“Bryce, I am so sorry. I had no idea this would happen. It was the only way you’d talk to me.” Liza’s voice trembles. “You wouldn’t talk to me!”

I swing the door open, and the scene in front of me makes my blood run cold. Liza is standing with Bryce’s hand in her own as tears coat her cheeks. Her eyes fly to mine and flash with surprise.

“What the fuck did you say?” I hiss. “What did you mean, you had no idea this would happen?”

“I thought we were alone,” she has the audacity to say.

“There is no ‘we’ when it comes to you and Bryce. But, apparently, you’re too much of a fucking dumbass bitch to understand that.” I stomp to her and take his hand away. “Step the fuck back.”

Wisely, she backs away.

“Now, tell me what you meant.”

The shock of seeing me wears off, and she straightens her shoulders, squaring off. “None of your business.”

Wrong thing to say. The look of guilt and despair on her face tells me immediately she has something to do with Bryce lying in this hospital bed.

Rage, fury, and hate boil to the surface and erupt. I drop Bryce’s hand and rear back. Before I can stop myself, I slap her with all the force in my body. There’s a loud crack as her head snaps to the side. She stumbles, falling into the wall. I try to lunge into her, but strong arms yank me back and restrain my movements.

“What in the ever loving fuck is going on?” Nate’s livid voice fuels my own anger even more.

“Liza is responsible for this.”

“What?” He back peddles us across the room, not letting me go. “Liza, what’s Devon talking about?”

She goes pale and looks at Bryce, holding her cheek. Finally, she takes a shaky breath and looks past me to my brother. “He was in the engine room because of me. I knew you were supposed to do the measurement testing the next morning, but I arranged for them to be ready. Once you went to bed that night, I had one of my guys tell him there were new data specs available. There was no doubt he’d go after them. It gave me a small window of opportunity to get him alone.”

“You lied?” His grip tightens around my chest, and he starts to shake.

“No, I did run new numbers. I had no idea there’d be an explosion.”

“The explosion was a freak accident. No one could have known. But that’s not the issue here. Why would you lure him down there?”

“He wouldn’t talk to me! For weeks, I’ve tried to apologize, but he avoided me. It’s bad enough I’m treated like a leper, but then I get the news I’m being transferred. This was an effort to beg him to make things right.”

“You need to leave now,” Nate growls. “We’ve all made it clear how we feel about you, yet you keep coming back. Get a fucking clue. You are a pathetic bitch. If you’re not out that door in five seconds, I’ll unleash Devon and turn my back.”

I struggle against him, wanting to claw her eyes out. She looks at Bryce once more then rushes out the door with her head hanging.

Nate lets me go and steps back. “What a fucking cunt.”