I don’t say anything. I just nod against his chest and pretend to sleep.
*****
The next day, I start packing for my trip and Declan starts packing for five days at Bonnaroo. The guys rented a camper and will be driving down on Wednesday night. They’re staying for the whole festival and then leaving next week to meet Knight’s Dream in North Carolina. Declan asked me to stay with them, but I refused.
Abbi and Ella join me as I pack. I finally tell them my plans to work in Europe for the summer. They know I’m running away from my heartbreak. I ask them not to say anything to Declan about the job being in Europe yet. I’m still holding on to hope.
I finish packing my bags when I’m satisfied with my wardrobe choices. I hide my bags in my closet so Declan won’t ask about them. The girls take off to watch a movie in the front room and I go to take a bath. I lower myself into the steamy, lavender scented water. Declan walks in and undresses to join me. He sits behind me and massages my shoulders, placing kisses along my neck. We hold each other until our hands begin to prune.
After our bath, I dress in my favorite black nightie and crawl next to him in bed. I straddle his lap, feeling him harden fully underneath me. He runs his fingers along my sides and pulls the satin back over my head and leans up to roll us over. His fingers circle my moist center. He inserts one finger and leisurely runs his thumb over my clit. Once he hits the right spot, I groan in his mouth. He leans back and watches me as the pleasure runs through me. I moan his name as the orgasm takes over. I’m not off my high yet and he glides into me. Bracing on his elbows, he slides in and out of me never breaking eye contact. I wrap my arms and legs around him, getting him as close as possible. Tears slip out of the corners of my eyes and he notices.
“Baby, please don’t cry. I see you pulling away from me. Every damn day, I feel you pulling yourself and pushing me. I need you to believe in us.”
“I did, but I can’t believe the decision you made. I have a job now so I can’t go with you even if you asked but…”
“Shh, don’t say that. You have to believe in us because it’s what keeps me going.”
I don’t respond; I just let him make love to me.
Chapter 42
Leaving
Saturday is a flurry of activity. I’ve been at my parents since Wednesday night. I’ll be gone almost eight weeks and my parents insisted on me spending my last few days with them. They know what’s going on and have encouraged me to go abroad. My dad wanted to address Declan directly, but Mom and I talked him out of calling him.
Sayge is performing at 2:00. By the time I get backstage, they are ready to go on. Declan spots me and runs over.
“Where have you been? I thought you were coming this morning. I tried to call you, but my phone died.”
“I was with my parents. I start my new job next week so they wanted to spend time with me.”
“This job is going to make you so busy that you can’t see your parents? I thought you were working for a friend of your dad’s”
“Declan, it’s time, get over here.” Jay interrupts before I can tell Declan that I’m leaving tonight.
He gives me a swift kiss and heads on-stage. I join Abbi, Ella, Jimi, and some other friends of Sayge I’ve seen at The Steamroom throughout the year. Jay tries to talk to me, but I ignore him. There’s a familiar face a few feet away taking notes on his IPad.
“Mike Jacobs, what are you doing here?”
“Raven, holy hell, how are you?” He hugs me quickly.
“I’m great! I’m back in Nashville studying at Vanderbilt. What about you?”
“I started a small company last year. It’s still young, but I have a little record label I’m trying to grow. So far there are only five employees, but I’m looking for the next big thing to hit the music scene. So I figured I should check out the biggest music fest around.”
“Yeah, well, Sayge’s pretty great. You should listen to them.”
“I’m impressed so far. I have a meeting with their rep, Jay.”
“Hmm,” is all I say.
“That good or bad?”
“It’s fine; I know all of them pretty well.”
We talk a little throughout the show, but we mostly watch Sayge play. The weather is scorching hot and Declan’s a sweaty mess. The crowd loves them. A few people in the crowd are singing along and several people are wearing Sayge shirts. I know the demand for Sayge merchandise will increase after this performance.
I rejoin our friends as Declan finishes their last song. Our cheers are drowned out by the crowd, but I continue to scream until I’m hoarse. Declan makes his way offstage and comes directly to me. No one stops him as he lifts and swings me in a circle. Pretty soon, I have his sweat all over me.