“Okay, but it’s ridiculous.”
“Man will you make sure she’s okay?” he asks Jimi who shakes his head yes.
He kisses me quickly and leaves again.
Two hours later, Sayge takes a break. Following Mike’s instructions, they have played their new music, and I know “Surviving” will be in their last set. I’ve told my friends about the song but purposely left out details on the intensity so I can watch their reactions.
Declan gets his guitar and practices a few chords with Blake as Cooper joins in on the keyboard. Nate takes them all a beer and then gets behind the drums.
“Hey guys, we’ve got a surprise for you tonight. We just cut a track with our label, and tonight’s the first time we’re performing it live. I hope you like it.” Declan yells at the crowd. They erupt in cheers.
When the song starts, I notice immediately how different it sounds live. Ella, Abbi, and Charlie come to stand with me. Declan’s voice is captivating as he sings through losing something you realize you can’t live without. Cooper participates in the vocals on the chorus. Even though they’re singing to a packed bar and the energy is high, the song is as raw as the first time I heard it. When they finish, Declan thanks the crowd and reminds them Sayge will be back on Saturday.
“Wow. That was pretty deep. I guess we know who wrote that and what it’s about.” Charlie says softly next to me.
I rope my arm through hers and lean my head on her shoulder. “It’s pretty amazing isn’t it?”
“Amazing, sad, beautiful, passionate, riveting–all of it.” Abbi adds.
Declan comes off the stage straight to me. I walk into his arms and squeeze him tight.
“That was incredible!” I tell him as I shower kisses across his face.
“Declan, that was fucking awesome man! I guess we have your good luck charm to thank for that.” Nate yells when we join everyone else back in the room.
“Yeah man, you haven’t performed like that in months. The whole show was badass.” Cooper says as he slaps Declan on the back.
“What do y’all mean?” I ask no one in particular.
“What they mean is that you are my muse in so many ways. I haven’t felt that alive on stage since Bonnaroo. Tonight I found my stage style again.” Declan whispers in my ear.
I don’t get a chance to ask for more details because the room starts to fill with people. Most of them trying to talk to the guys about their summer tour and any upcoming events.
Finally, after hours of talking to fans, Declan asks me if we can l
eave. Ella, Abbi, and Jimi left a while ago, and Charlie and Blake walk out with us. We leave Nate and Cooper on the couch with three very eager Band Bunnies.
On our way home, I decide not to ask Declan about his earlier statement. He’s already explained to me his state of mind during our time apart, and I don’t want to discuss it again.
“Declan, I know I said it before, but Sayge was really great tonight.”
“And I explained why–because you were there.”
“That’s ridiculous. I think it was the local hometown crowd.”
“There’s that too, but my mind was more relaxed and focused because you were finally back with me. I know you think it’s crazy, but it’s true.”
“Well honey, we need to talk because this semester is going to be tough, and I’m not going to have the freedom I did last year. Particularly since I don’t have Fridays off. I won’t be able to come to every show if you go back to three to four shows a week around town. You have a commitment to your fans to perform at one-hundred percent. Especially since you’re recording.” I sound harsher than I mean to.
“We’ll see.” He shrugs
I try several times to talk more about our schedules, but he closes up and won’t discuss it.
When we get to his house, he pulls me directly to the bathroom and starts the shower. Without saying a word, he undresses us both and leads me under the hot water. His hands work their way up my body leaving a trail of goose bumps. He kisses me breathless and I brace against his chest. Using only his hands to communicate, he grasps my hips, pulls me forward and lifts me until my legs wrap around his waist. Slowly he lowers me down until he is all the way in. I throw my head back, close my eyes and groan. Squeezing as hard as I can, I try to move but he holds me tighter. Moving us so I’m against the cool tile and he is under the water spray, he kisses up my neck until he gets to my ear. I shiver against him.
“Sparkle, I’ve been thinking about it for a while, but your little tantrum in the car made me realize I needed to discuss it with you tonight.” He moves in and out of me so slowly my body aches. I’m not sure what exactly he thinks we need to discuss right now.
“You see, I hate this going back and forth shit. I want you to move in with me.”