“Your students are crazy about you, especially Steve Carr. You’re a natural with people, young or old.”
“Thank you,” she whispered while she straightened her desk.
“What did you tell him about yourself?”
“That I’m a counselor and am considering settling down here in Gardiner. I refrained from informing him I plan to marry his teacher as soon as possible.”
Her breath caught.
“Is there anything I can help you do before we leave?”
“No—I’m ready.”
“Good. Then I’ll follow you home and we’ll go to dinner.”
“No—” she cried jerkily. “I’d rather we weren’t seen together socially.” The fact that he’d shown up at her classroom tonight was bad enough. Going out to dinner would generate more gossip. After he left Gardiner, she didn’t relish making explanations to any more people than she had to.
His eyes gleamed. “Fine. I much prefer talking to you at your apartment.” He reached the door and flipped off the switch. “After you, Sydney.”
She could hardly breathe as she moved past him and they made their way down the side stairs to the nearest exit. They passed a few teachers and parents. Sydney smiled at them, but kept walking at a brisk pace so no one would detain her. The less explanations to anyone about the attractive male at her side, the better.
After escorting her to her car, he followed in his blue rental. Her apartment was only a few streets away. By the time he pulled in one of the visitor stalls and came around to help her, her heart was pounding out of control. She could hardly move her limbs. Being this near to him made her go weak with desire, but always accompanying it was this stabbing guilt.
He looked down at her from veiled eyes. “Shall I get in the passenger side so we can talk, or are you going to invite me inside your place?”
“I-it would be better if you just left now,” she stammered.
Though they weren’t touching, she felt his body stiffen. “You never want to see me again. Is that what you’re saying?”
She shook her head in despair. “I want you to go back to Cannon.”
Jarod’s eyes grew bleak. “But it’s not what I want.”
Heartsick she cried, “You wanted it once, or you would never have taken your vows. It’s too late.”
“Shall we continue talking here where everyone in the complex can hear us?” he reminded her in a low voice.
He was right. Since she’d driven in, two other tenants had come out to their cars.
Summoning her strength, she got out of the driver’s seat and hurried past him toward her apartment. While she unlocked the door, he followed at a slower pace.
In a final effort to be strong, she barred the entry, letting him know she didn’t want him to come in.
“I’ve had time to think it over. I won’t be the person who’s responsible for ruining your life. One day you’ll thank me. Time and a change of scene without me is what you need to come to your senses.”
“Sydney—” His voice sounded like it was reaching out to her from deep inside a dark cavern.
She trembled despite her resolve. “This has to be goodbye, Jarod.”
In a move of desperation, she closed the door and locked it.
Sydney listened for his car. When she finally heard the sound of the motor and knew he’d driven off, she staggered over to the couch where she collapsed in despair.
Her loss was so great, she couldn’t bear it. Great heaving sobs broke from her body.
The dream she’d dreamed of his giving up the priesthood for her had come true. This was the real thing. But it had turned into a nightmare.
How could she marry him knowing t