“Fine, but if you think you’re getting rid of me so easily, you have another thing coming, Greg,” I spoke in a singsong. “Close the place up?”
I needed to go check on my mother. As per usual, she gave me the silent treatment after what happened this morning and refused to take my calls.
“Actually, I have to run. A patient just paged me. Mind locking up before you leave?” he called out to me.
“Not at all!” I answered from the restroom. “Go ahead. It’s been a moon and a half since I closed shop.”
Five minutes later, I found myself scrubbing medical equipment clean and locking up cabinets.
I heard a knock on the clinic’s door.
Who on earth …?
For obvious reasons, we didn’t allow walk-ins.
Frowning, I walked over to the door and looked through the peephole.
Merde.
I quickly smoothed my scrubs over my body, rearranging my long ponytail.
Still, I didn’t open the door. I didn’t breathe. I didn’t move.
Go away. Please. You are too much and not enough all at the same time.
“Too late, Nix. I know you’re in there. Your car is parked directly in front of the doorway.”
Double merde. I had no one but myself to blame for my lack of discretion.
Still, I didn’t move. I watched through the peephole as Sam braced one arm over the doorframe, sneering down at the floor like they were sharing a secret.
“We can do this the nice way or the not-so-nice way. But you should know, my not-so-nice ways include smashing doors down, rummaging through places, and doing very dangerous fucking things.”
“Go to hell.”
“Can’t. Satan has a restraining order against me. Now open the damn door.”
“I hate you,” I groaned, plastering my forehead to the door, closing my eyes.
“No, you don’t.”
“I should.”
“No fucking shit, Sherlock. Open up.”
Reluctantly, I did as I was told, stepping aside. There was no point blocking his way with all one hundred and twenty pounds of me.
We stared at each other, the threshold between us like an ocean neither of us was willing to cross. My heart beat wildly.
He did it again. He came to see me. Sought me out.
“You kill people,” he said softly.
I gasped, stumbling backward. He stepped forward, walking into the clinic, not bothering to close the door behind him.
“I finally figured it out. Even though it was in front of me all this time, in plain sight. You kill people. That’s what you do. Mercy killing. Euthanasia.”
My back bumped against the opposite wall, and I squeezed my eyes shut childishly. Maybe if I pretended he wasn’t there, he’d disappear. But no. His voice hovered around me, thickening the air, making it too hot to breathe.
“That’s why you limit yourself to very few patients. That’s why it’s an underground operation. That’s why you keep all the drugs you have in here. That’s why you treat them at their homes. It all makes sense. You’re not here to cure people, you’re here to kill them. The only question is why? Why are you, the sweet, caring Aisling Fitzpatrick, doing this? Your brothers always told me you wanted to be an OB-GYN or a pediatrician. Something with babies involved, they said. The exact opposite of what you turned out to be.”
My eyes fluttered open on their own accord, and I met his gaze. Images of my mother earlier this morning spread over my bedroom carpet, helplessly bawling, attacked my memory. I didn’t want to be her. Meek and weak and always hiding her real self from the world. I straightened my back, taking a deep breath.
But old habits die hard …
“You can’t prove it.”
“I don’t need to. You’ll tell me your truth.”
“While you’re keeping so many secrets from me?” I choked on my bitterness, spluttering, “Nice try. Why are you here, Sam?”
His jaw ticked, but he said nothing.
“I find it hard to believe my job means so much to you. Whether I cure or kill people, it makes no difference to you. You owe me nothing, and your job is not to watch over me. In fact, it is the very opposite—to stay away from me. So why are you pushing this?”
His nostrils flared. He took my face in his rough palm, tilting my head so our mouths were aligned.
“I don’t fucking know, Aisling. I have no idea what keeps bringing me back to you, but I can’t seem to stop, and you don’t seem to mind, so let’s just get this out of our system and fuck already.”
The next thing happened like a snake bite. Sudden and fast and violent.
I kissed him roughly, this time taking what I wanted instead of waiting for it. Our kiss made me feel like we were lashing out at each other. Sam caught my lower lip between his teeth and tugged me closer to him, until there was no more space between us. He hoisted me up and carried me into the examination room, kicking the door open and spreading me flat over the table, kissing me as I toed off my work sneakers and unbuttoned his shirt.