Now.
With a reluctant sigh, I pulled back and blinked the world around us into focus. Next thing I knew we were on the sofa, me perched on Jamie’s lap, his thick cock nestled between my thighs, and dammit, I wished like hell he was just some guy I didn’t give a shit about. He pushed up, and I moaned again, long and low, keeping my eyes shut until I had my wits about me.
“This is why we can’t be roommates, Jamie.”
“But we’re still friends, right?”
“Yeah, of course we are.”
“You sure?”
I nodded and stood on shaky legs.
“As soon as I get home for a nice cold shower, we’ll be good as gold.”
Jamie laughed and stood, not doing a damn thing to hide the giant boner that had to be uncomfortable for him. “Think of me while you hose yourself off, then.”
“Right back at ya,” I told him with a laugh.
“Don’t worry, I will.” Then, just to prove what a standup guy he was, Jamie opened the door and walked me to my car. “See you soon, Madds.”
“Not if I see you first.” I rushed home because that cold shower was calling my name, except about halfway back to Ashby Manor, I paused. That was one hell of a kiss, and now that I knew what—and how much—he was packing, my body was on fire, and only Jameson could put it out.
Turn around. Go back.
I shook my head at that wayward thought. “Nope. Not doing that, no matter how much I want to.” And I wanted to, a lot. I hadn’t felt all that deprived of sex or male companionship since Molly had gone missing, but two kisses with Jameson and I was rubbing my thighs together like a cat in heat. Hot and hungry for him. Only for him.
It’s not too late. Turn around.
He hadn’t made a secret of the fact he wouldn’t mind adding benefit to our friendship so I could go back, but then what? Then came the inevitable, the distance, and then the disappearance altogether. Jamie was my best friend, and I wasn’t ready to lose him. Not yet.
I could have him in my fantasies. For now.
And that would have to be enough.
Chapter Sixteen
Jameson
“This isn’t really your type of hangout is it?”
Beau Vanderbilt, Moon’s son, looked up with a laugh as he gazed around the darkened twenty-four-hour bar as though he’d just seen it for the first time. He’d texted me to meet him here, but why did he have to pick such a god-awful early hour of the morning? I’m not sure the roosters were even up yet.
The place was older than dirt and still had box TVs on the wall, two of them, along with wood paneling, fake leather seat covers and gum under every table in sight.
“No, I guess it’s not really.” He pointed to the seat opposite him by way of an invite to sit down, “and that makes it perfect. That and it has no free wi-fi, no cameras or other surveillance tools. Totally analog.”
“Sounds interesting.” I slid into the seat and held my hand out. “It’s good to see you man, it’s been a long time.”
“It has. No time off when you work for the NSA, especially my department. I told them I had to run home for the weekend to check on my mom.”
I furrowed my brow. “What’s wrong with Moon?” I pictured her, so lively and maternal in her long hippie dresses and muscled arms filled with tinkling bracelets. “Is she all right?”
“She’s fine, and my dad is too, but this information is too sensitive to trust to unsecure tech. Family’s always a good excuse to get off by myself. But before we get into all that, catch me up.”
I sighed and nodded. “Ma is great, Dad is still a grumpy old man. Charlie’s the president of the Reckless Bastards, and he and Savannah are a thing.”
“Savannah?”
“Formerly Rhymer, now O’Connor. It’s a long story, and too early for the beer I’ll need to fill you in.”
“Says who?” Beau flashed a teasing grin and sat back. “All right, go on.”
“Charlie is doing a good job as Prez, at least as far as I can tell, but there’s been some weird tension between us—on his part—because Savannah knew Mueller, and I’ve questioned her a few times. He was cool with me being a cop, until he wasn’t.”
Beau let out a low whistle. “Talk about complicated. You sure you don’t want to come work with the Feds?”
I laughed and shook my head. “I’m actually working with them now. It’s a lucky break, at least it will be if I can help them crack the double murder. If not, I might be stuck on patrol forever.”
“That sure as shit won’t happen. Trust me.” Beau flashed a confident smile that was so unlike the shy kid I’d known back in the day, and almost without me seeing it, produced a flash drive. “Your hunch was right, Dietrich Mueller, also known as Richie Mueller by friends, family and FBI members alike, is…well he was undercover.”