Courage (Heroes of Big Sky 1)

“It’s okay.” I tousle my hair with my hands. “I have to get up. I don’t want to miss the first day of school.”

“We have donuts,” Kevin announces as he jumps off the bed. “I want another one!”

“That explains the energy level,” I say dryly as Kelsey follows her brother out of my room. “You took them for donuts?”

“No, I got up before everyone else, so I went and got a dozen. There’s plenty left for you, as long as we don’t leave the kids to their own devices for too long. I’ll let you get dressed into something more decent.”

I scowl and look down. “It’s a nightgown. I’m not showing anything.”

Sam rubs his hand over his lips and then leans in to whisper in my ear. “I can see your nipples pressed against the cotton of that thing. And it makes me want things, Tash, that aren’t appropriate with two five-year-olds waiting to go to school.”

Without another word or touch, he turns and leaves the room.

Leaving me all hot and bothered. Damn him.

“It’s just a simple cotton nightgown,” I grumble. “It’s not like I’m wearing something from Victoria’s Secret or anything.”

Still, I wiggle my way into leggings and a T-shirt with a blue flannel shirt over it, teasing my hair into a ponytail. I only wince a little when the motion makes my hand sing in protest.

“We’re ready for pictures,” Kevin announces, holding up his chalkboard. Every slot is filled in on both of them, and I turn my eyes to Sam.

“You filled them out.”

“Yeah,” he says with a nod. “I guess they didn’t come out too bad.”

“They look great.” The writing isn’t fancy like Monica’s would have been, but the letters are perfectly legible. I can tell he put a lot of effort into this. “Thanks.”

“Let’s go outside for some pictures,” Sam suggests.

The kids pose with their chalkboards on the porch, their little backpacks slung over their shoulders and wide smiles on their faces. I pose them together and separate.

And then we pile into the truck and head the short distance to the elementary school.

“We’ll be here to get you when you’re done,” I remind them as we walk hand-in-hand to their classroom. We visited last week so they could meet their teacher and see the room they’ll be in. We all thought it was a good idea for them to be in the same classroom this year as the twins tend to act out when they’re on their own.

“Okay,” Kevin says and doesn’t even bother to wave at us as he hurries off to see his friends.

“I don’t want to,” Kelsey says and turns to me with tears in her eyes. “I want to go with you.”

“You’ve been looking forward to school,” I remind her gently and squat next to her. “There’s your friend, Trinity. And Lucy. You know the other kids, Kels.”

She grabs my leg, but Mrs. Delgado hurries over with a wide, welcoming smile on her pretty face.

“Hi there, Kelsey. Welcome. I’m so excited you’re here. We’re going to have such a fun day.”

“I love you, and I’ll see you very soon.” I kiss her cheek, and Mrs. Delgado seamlessly takes the little girl’s hand and leads her away, giving me the nod to go.

Sam and I leave the classroom and walk out to his truck.

But when we climb inside, he doesn’t start the engine.

“It should be Monica,” I say and wipe away a tear. “Monica should be here to take her babies to school, take pictures, and fill out their chalkboards.”

“I know it.” Sam sighs. “But the thing is, Tash, she’s not. She’s not here. No matter how unfair it is. You can’t feel guilty every time there’s a new life event in the kids’ lives over the next thirty years because there will be dozens of them.”

“I know.” I wipe my nose on the handkerchief he offers me. “I know that. But, Jesus, Sam, it’s only been a few months. I’m still adjusting to this. Monica was excited for today. She prepared for it months ago. She should be here to see it. It pisses me off that she isn’t.”

“Me, too, honey. Me, too.” He kisses my hand. “Rich and my sister were good parents. They waited a long time to have kids, and they loved it. All we can do is make them proud of us. And of the kids.”

“Yeah.” I swallow the last of my tears. “You’re right. I think I need a donut.”

“Coming right up.”

Chapter 4

~Sam~

“I see Isha!” Kelsey exclaims, pointing at Noah and Fallon’s daughter playing in a field with puppies. “Can I go?”

“Go ahead,” Tash says with a smile. “Have fun. Try not to get too dirty.”

“We’re at a ranch,” I remind her as we glance around the Lazy K Ranch, owned by the King family, outside of Cunningham Falls. I’ve been here plenty over the years, from helping with medical emergencies to enjoying barbecues like this one. “They’re gonna get dirty.”