Courage (Heroes of Big Sky 1)

“Yes, she was insistent that since I won’t let her get a puppy, she would be a puppy.”

I laugh and then watch in concern as Fallon rubs her belly. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah, we’re getting so close. I’m just uncomfortable all the time. I think I need a Snickers.”

“I’m quite sure we can find a few around here somewhere.”

Sure enough, we find a big bowl of candy bars and help ourselves to a few while we wait for Sam to show the kids everything there is to see.

“Are you sure you’ll feel good enough to go trick or treating around my neighborhood?” I ask her when she rubs her belly again. “If you want to go home, I’ll take Isha with us, and bring her home later.”

“No, the walking is good for me,” Fallon says.

The kids come running over to show us their loot and talk about everything they got to see.

“Can we go get more candy now?” Kevin asks.

“Who’s this little cowgirl?”

I glance over to see Seth King smiling down at Kelsey.

“It’s me! Kelsey.”

“Well, you look just like you should be riding a real horse. Maybe you guys could come out to the ranch, and I’ll put the kids on a horse.”

“Can we?” Kelsey grabs my arm and pulls. “Please, please, please can we?”

“Sure.” I smile at Seth gratefully. “We’d like that.”

“Cool. Be safe tonight, guys. And don’t eat all the candy. Save some for the rest of us.”

We wave and leave the fire hall. I was hoping to see Sam one more time, but he seems to be off with some other kids.

Just as we reach my car, I hear someone calling my name.

I turn to find Sam running out to meet me. Good God, the way that man fills out his CFFD T-shirt should be illegal.

“Did we forget something?” I ask when he reaches me.

“Hell yes, you did.” He kisses me. Not on the cheek. And not lightly.

He cups my face and sinks into me in that way he does when it seems as if he’s trying to consume me.

It makes me dizzy. Makes me want much, much more.

“There. That’ll hold me over.” He smiles down at me, waves at the kids, and runs back into the fire hall.

Fallon beeps her horn, waking me from this fuzzy haze of lust.

“Oh, sorry. Coming.”

The drive back to my place doesn’t take long. Fallon pulls into the driveway behind me, and we meet up on the sidewalk.

“I planned to just basically go around the block,” I say to my friend. “They’ll get plenty of candy. And it’s a little chilly tonight, anyway.”

“Sounds good to me.” We fall into step, the kids bouncing ahead of us. We wait on the sidewalk as they make their way to my neighbor’s front door to say, “Trick or treat!”

“So, how are things going?” Fallon asks.

“Good, actually.” I laugh when Kelsey stares down into her bag to see what someone dropped inside. “Things have calmed down a lot since the start of the school year. We’re almost in a routine. Kids are doing well in kindergarten, and I’m actually managing to keep it all together at home. Sam stays with us when he’s not at work. It’s normal.”

“That’s awesome,” Fallon says.

“I will admit, though, I’m not looking forward to the holidays.” We walk down the sidewalk to the next house. “I was a mess today. Worried about making Halloween just so, just the way Monica would do it. I wanted it to be familiar and special for them. And now I get to feel like this for the next two months. I’m not excited for it at all.”

“Hmm, I don’t think I agree with this approach,” she says. “Who says you have to do everything the way Monica did or would? You’re not her, Tash. I think you need to make it fun for all of you, get the kids involved, and make new memories. New traditions. If you do the alternative, you’ll only make yourself crazy. There’s enough to be sad about right now. Let yourself enjoy the holidays.”

I take a deep breath and let it out slowly. “Yeah, you’re right. I just don’t want them to think that I’m trying to erase their parents.”

“They’re five,” she reminds me. “They will enjoy it if you do. If you’re a basket case, it won’t be fun for any of you.”

“Thanks.” I wrap my arm around her shoulders and give her a squeeze. “I needed that reminder.”

“Now, tell me what I really want to know.” She grins at me. “How are things with Sam? If that kiss was any indication, I’d say you’re doing well.”

“We’re doing well.” I shrug and then return her smile with one of my own. “He’s pretty great.”

“Super into you,” she says. “It’s sweet to watch.”

It’s pretty sweet from my side of things, too.