Courage (Heroes of Big Sky 1)

“I can handle breakfast,” I reply. “But please don’t ask me to buy a present because I have no idea.”

“I’m tired.” She sets the tube down and sighs. “I didn’t sleep well. And then Kevin came in, and I totally overthought it for hours.”

“You woke up?”

“Of course, I woke up. You had a conversation. I’m a light sleeper.”

I reach for her, but she narrows her eyes. I can take a hint. She’s not happy.

“You’re mad because I let Kevin sleep with us?”

“No.” She shakes her head and stomps out of the bathroom, pushes past me, and starts rummaging through her drawers for something to wear.

I would ask her if she’s about to have her period, but I value my balls.

“You have to help me out here, babe, because I’m lost. And I don’t want you to be mad at me all day long. I can’t handle it. Just tell me how to fix it, and I will. Honest.”

She sighs and sits on the edge of the bed. “I wasn’t ready for one of the kids to come in here and discover that we’re sleeping together.”

“We weren’t having sex,” I remind her. “We had clothes on, and we were sleeping.”

“I know, but now I feel like I have to explain it to them, and I don’t know what to say.”

I rub my fingers into my eyes. “Okay, we’re going to handle this right now. Get dressed and let’s go.”

“Wait, what are we going to handle?”

“The sleeping situation. I’m a grown-ass man, Tash. If I want to sleep in the same bed as you, I will, kids or no kids. They literally don’t care. So, let’s go have this conversation, shall we?”

“But.” She blinks in surprise, but I don’t give her a chance to argue.

“I said get dressed and let’s go.”

I leave the room and find the kids, already eating cereal all by themselves, sitting in front of the TV watching a cartoon.

“Hi, guys. When your aunt joins us, I have something to talk to you about.”

They don’t even pause in eating their Cap’n Crunch.

“Okay,” Kevin says, unconcerned.

“There she is.” I smile at the woman I love, Jesus, I love her, but she just narrows her eyes at me again. “So, we just wanted to have a quick chat with you about the sleeping arrangements.”

“Do we have to sleep somewhere else?” Kelsey asks.

“Not you guys,” I reply. “You know how Auntie Tash got the guest room all ready for me?”

They nod.

“Well, I think I’d rather just sleep in Tash’s room. With her. It’s more comfortable. What do you think of that?”

“If I have a bad dream, can I still come in there?” Kelsey asks.

“Of course.” I pat her on the shoulder. “Nothing else will change.”

“Our mommy and daddy slept together,” Kevin points out. “And that was fine.”

Tash sighs, but I just give her a look and nod at Kevin. “Yeah, they did. And it was no big deal, right?”

Kevin shrugs, not interested in this conversation in the least. Kelsey finishes her cereal and grins at Tash.

“Can I have another bowl?” she asks.

“Sure,” Tash says. “So, we’re done talking about where Sam sleeps?”

“Huh?” Kevin says, already watching his cartoon again. “Yeah.”

“Okay.” Tash takes Kelsey’s bowl and walks into the kitchen.

I hurry behind her.

“See? They don’t care.”

“Why do I think things are a big deal when they’re not at all? You’re right, I’m totally an overthinker.”

“You’re just trying to be a good parent, and a good role model. But you don’t have to try so hard to do that, Tash. You’re excellent without having to try. Just be yourself. The kids love and respect you. They always have.”

I pull her to me and kiss her softly, then wrap my arms around her and pull her in for a long hug.

We’re rocking back and forth when we hear, “Yuck.”

I glance over to find Kelsey making a face. “Hugs aren’t yucky.”

“You’re getting mushy,” she says as if she’s fifteen instead of five. “I want my cereal.”

“Coming up,” Tash says with a laugh. “I got sidetracked.”

Kelsey runs back to the TV, and Tash pours the cereal. “I’m sorry I was in a bad mood.”

“We all have them.” I grab a bottle of protein smoothie out of the fridge and open it for my breakfast. “Let’s not stress so much about being together around the kids, okay? We’re not doing anything wrong, and I’m sick of hiding.”

“Yeah, okay.” She carries the bowl out to Kelsey and then comes back to eat her normal breakfast of a banana and yogurt. “I have to run and grab that gift. It shouldn’t take too long. Then, if I don’t have to stay at the party, I’ll drop them off and run some other errands.”

“I can take them to the party,” I reply. “You run your errands. If I have to stay, I’ll stay. No big.”