Courage (Heroes of Big Sky 1)

“No, I’m sure they didn’t.” Sam kisses my temple. “Lunch?”

“That’s the second invitation I’ve had today.” I force a smile but don’t feel particularly happy. I want to go home, get into bed, and pull the covers over my head. “Sure. What should we get?”

“Chinese.” He grins. “With extra fortune cookies.”

“You know, you can just buy fortune cookies.”

“Where’s the fun in that?”

* * *

“We’ll see him in a week,” I reassure the kids as we watch Sam load his bags into his truck. “That’s not very long at all, right?”

“Forever,” Kevin mutters but lets Sam hug him.

“You have to put out fires far away,” Kelsey says as he kisses her cheek, then blows a raspberry to make her giggle.

“That’s right. But I won’t be gone for that long, and then I’ll be back, just like Auntie Tash said. Be good for her, hear me?”

They both nod solemnly.

“Can we watch Scooby?” Kevin asks.

“Sure. Go ahead.” They run inside, and I turn to Sam. “Drive safely.”

“Nah, I’m gonna be reckless and take chances.”

“Smartass.” I wrap my arms around his waist. “Call me later.”

“Of course.” His lips touch mine, and then he sinks into me, kissing me like crazy for the whole neighborhood to see. “Be good.”

“You be good.” I pat his butt as he pulls away. “I’ll talk to you later.”

“Okay.” He pauses and kisses me once more.

“You’re going to be late.”

“You’re trying awfully hard to get rid of me.”

“Yeah, Pierre is waiting for me in the bedroom. I just have to get rid of those pesky kids.”

Go. I don’t want you to see me fall apart.

“Now who’s the smartass?”

“Could be the truth.” I grin when his eyes narrow. “I have some stuff to do when you go. And I don’t want you to be late. Plus, I want you to drive safely.”

I don’t want to make a fool of myself and beg you to stay.

“I’m going. Have a good day.”

He plants those lips on my forehead once more and then gets in the truck, waves, and pulls away.

He’s gone.

I turn and walk inside, sit on the couch, and stare at the TV, but I don’t really see or hear what’s playing.

The rushing sound in my ears is too loud.

He’s gone.

Yes, he’s coming back. And, yes, I’m the one who told him to go.

But I’ll miss him.

“Why are you crying?” Kelsey asks as she slips into my lap, framing my face with her tiny hands. “Are you sad?”

“A little.” I wipe a tear off my cheek and smile at her. “But I’m okay.”

“Do you want to snuggle my Teddy?”

“Nah, I think I’ll just snuggle you.” I tug her close and breathe in her sweet smell. She’s so little. So sweet.

And it’s just the three of us against the world now.

“Maybe you need a cookie,” Kevin says.

“Do you want a cookie?” I ask him.

“If it makes you feel better for me to eat a cookie with you, that would be okay.”

I laugh and set Kelsey on her feet, taking their hands. “We have one snafu. No cookies in the house. I guess we’ll have to make some, huh?”

“With chocolate chips!” Kelsey exclaims.

“We can do that. Just no sprinkles or anything shaped like Santa. I’ve had my fill of that for a whole year.”

“Chocolate chips are circles,” Kevin says like I’ve lost my mind. “Not Santa.”

“True that. Okay, let’s get started.”

“Maybe, if it’ll make you feel better, we can have hot chocolate, too.” Kevin’s grin is sly and wide.

“You’re a con artist.” I kiss his head. “But you have good ideas.”

Chapter 18

~Sam~

The roads suck. I should have realized that I’d run into snow and ice on the highway in early January. It slows me up a bit.

It’ll probably add an extra hour to the drive. Tash was right, I should have left earlier. I’m supposed to meet with the chief at the station at three this afternoon.

Being late on day one isn’t the best way to make a first impression.

And I’m never late.

But leaving Tash and the kids was torture.

“I’m fucking up.” I rub my hand over my mouth. “I should be there.”

I tap the screen on my truck and listen as the phone rings on the other end.

“Hello?” Tash says. I can hear the smile in her voice.

“Hey, babe. What are you doing?”

“The kids and I made cookies and then we had some hot chocolate because I’m a horrible parent who gives the kids loads of sugar. Now, we’re building stuff with the blocks Kevin got for Christmas. Are you there already? You made good time.”

“No, I’m about halfway there. The roads are shit, so I’m taking it slow.”

“Oh, no. Be careful. You shouldn’t be talking to me.”

“I need to.” I blow out a breath. I should have had this talk with her weeks ago. “Maybe I should turn around and come home.”

“Why? Did you forget something?”