I almost snorted chocolate down the wrong tube at that thought, and in fact started coughing so hard I had to pull over. I managed to get the coughing under control, but by then I was laughing so hard at the image of Crawford and Jill together that tears ran down my face.
And then all of the events of the day flooded back in and I found myself crying for real. I clung to the steering wheel as if it was a lifeline, resting my forehead on it as I indulged in a few badly needed minutes of emotional release.
I finally lifted my head and took a deep breath, then continued on home.
But not before ripping the chips open.
By the time I made it to my house I’d managed to consume the chocolate and the chips, and my funk had been replaced by a queasiness in my belly. I shoved the ice cream into my freezer, then headed down to my basement.
I need to talk to Rhyzkahl, I told myself. It had nothing to do with a desperate need for comfort right now. Really.
Crouching by the partially full storage diagram, I took several settling breaths, then attempted to draw potency into it. But attempt was the correct word, because I couldn’t draw anything. I was too unsettled and far too exhausted, and the power seemed to slip out of my control like an oiled eel.
I continued to try to pull power for at least fifteen minutes, then finally gave up and collapsed in a sweating and shaking heap in the chair by the fireplace. And if I’d been attempting to open a portal, I’d be dead now, I thought as fear and nausea twined in my gut. Even if I’d had power at my disposal, it would have been stupid to try to perform a summoning.
I crawled back upstairs, literally so for the last few steps, then stumbled to the bathroom and threw up the chocolate and chips. I knelt on the bathroom floor, head pounding as I fought the urge to cry. I’d done enough of that today.
I’m safe here, I told myself as I stumbled to my bedroom. My house is warded and protected against living creatures and arcane power.
But even as exhausted as I was, it was still a long time before I could get to sleep.
Chapter 21
I woke up feeling stupidly hungover—hardly fair since I’d thrown up all of the bad stuff I’d eaten. I felt marginally better after coffee, which restored a small measure of my faith in the universe. If coffee had failed me, I’d have been sorely tempted to go right back to bed and never get up again. But two cups of coffee and a toasted bagel later, I felt almost ready to face the world. Bury myself in work was part of my plan for the day. The other part was to try and forget about summonings and relationships and anything else that was stress inducing.
I had a feeling I was going to have more success with the first portion.
My first stop of the day was the crime lab to drop off the laptop we’d seized at Adam Taylor’s house and to beg, plead, and whine to have it bumped to the top of the queue for forensic examination. As much as I itched to fire it up and see what files were on it, I knew that was a perfect way to destroy evidence. I wasn’t a whiz at computers by any stretch, but I’d attended plenty of training sessions where it had been drilled into our thick little heads that doing anything to a computer—even turning it on—altered the data on it and could jeopardize the integrity of evidence.
Jill was in the front office of the crime lab when I entered. She was hunched over a table against the wall, peering through a fingerprint viewer at a latent print card. She glanced up at the sound of the door.
“Heya, chick!” she said with a broad smile. “You slumming?”
Curiosity about her visitor last night surged, but I smacked it down. I wasn’t going to risk my friendship with Jill over a guy. Even if there was the slightest chance that it could be Ryan. Which it wasn’t. I was sure of that. I was.
I forced myself to veer away from any thoughts related to Ryan. Last night’s incident with Zack was still far too fresh in my mind, and thinking too hard about Ryan or what the hell he was being punished for, or the insane possibility that he could be seeing Jill, would easily tip me right over the edge. Bury myself in work. Really, it’s so much healthier, right?
I gave Jill a teasing smile. “I figured I’d watch you pretend to work,” I replied.
She rolled her eyes. “Riiiight. Because I’m merely killing time doing the work of three techs.” She snorted and pushed the stack of fingerprint cards away from her. “One of these days I’m gonna go blind from looking at that crap. You know, most real departments have crime labs where people actually specialize in one area, instead of having to know how to do everything.”
“Obviously, your rank recognizes your superior intelligence and wants to make sure you remain suitably challenged.”
She made a hacking noise. “So, as much as I want to believe that you merely want to bask in my presence, I’m willing to bet that you need my help with something?”
“I love basking in your presence. But actually I’m here to drop this off for examination.” I lifted the laptop case. “And, to find out if I can get it examined soooon?” I gave her a puppy-dog-eyes hopeful look.
She drew back in mock fear. “Stop making that face and I’ll do anything you ask!”
I laughed. “Really? Cool!”
“Don’t push it,” she warned, eyes flashing with humor. “As it so happens, I convinced our resident nerd to run Mr. Kerry’s laptop yesterday, so there’s a very good chance he’ll have something to show you today.”
“I knew there was a reason I was friends with you!” I said.
“Nah, you love me for the running,” she retorted. “C’mon, I’ll take you to the computer lab.”
She swiped her access card at the reader by the main lab door, and I dutifully followed her through. It didn’t take long for me to be grateful for her role as a tour guide as we made our way through the winding corridors. We finally ended up on the second floor at the end of a long hallway, in front of a door with a sign taped to it with the dire warning, “Do NOT walk in to this lab without knocking first! Contraband material present. Knock first!”