The Daughter In Law

I had to get my thinking cap on. All this time I've been playing defense, time to switch that shit up. I'd only given him a small taste of what she really is last night, now it's blitzkrieg time. I have to get this shit right before my kid gets here. I got paper and pen to put down my thoughts. First and foremost did I want to salvage any kind of relationship with this demon from hell? Not just no but hell no. Did I want to spend the next thirty or forty years on a battlefield? Nope. Do I want to let her get over on me ever again? Oh hell no.

The phone rang just then and the caller ID said the hagfish was calling. She's relentless; she'd fuck with my ass and then call me up like nothing happened. Stupid me always answered because I wanted to keep the peace. Not this time. Who would've ever thought that letting something go to voice mail would be so cathartic? Her screech was enough to make my ears bleed. Toxic bitch.

I got my shit down and left the house to get away from her calling nonstop every second on the second. I killed time doing nothing at all and it felt good. Usually I’d just be hanging around the house, like a sitting duck waiting for her to take aim. I was her sometimes errand girl and gofer, or her pincushion. No more, that shit was dead; I’m going to take my power back with or without her son. And if he wanted to have any kind of relationship with the kid I’m almost sure I’m carrying, he’d better get his shit together quick.

That night as soon as he came through the door he started his shit, but I was expecting it so was prepared.

"Mom said she's been calling all day but you weren't here."

"Oh? I must've been out." Give that one a think army boy. I'm sure her next step is to convince you that I'm cheating anyway, now you gotta wonder. I had his dinner ready and waiting and was looking rather scrumptious myself. We enjoyed a pleasant meal together where I didn't mention her even once. Bliss. He didn't bring it up either so I'm pretty sure he thought it was water under the bridge. Yeah, if I could drown the old cow in it! That night I was all sugar and spice when I put it on him. I hit him with the magic pussy and knocked his ass out cold.

Chapter 5

The phone rang off the hook again the next day and again I ignored it. Mom and dad showed up that evening and I was the picture of surprised. We'd agreed on that one. Damien was excited to see my parents; he always is because they treat him like he's more than navel lint. He and dad started gabbing about some sports team or the other while mom and I snuck off to the kitchen.

"So tell me, how's it been going?"

"I haven't heard her irritating screech in two days, I let the phone go to voicemail. She's taken to blowing up my cell but I don't answer that either. She can't reach Damien on base because he doesn't use his phone except in extreme emergencies so she's assed out."

"That's a good start baby. Total cutoff, I like it. Had to do that shit to your grandma in the beginning 'til she came to her damn senses, what a bitch."

"Momma."

"What you think you're the first one to have this problem? Old wrinkle tits had her drawers in a bunch until I put her ass in her place. Almost left your father then too."

"I can't believe it, you and grandma?"

"Girl just about every female goes through that shit when they marry one of these golden sons."

"Well at least you and grandma get along now but I don't think I can forget all the shit she's done to me. I want nothing to do with her AT ALL."

"That's a hard road to take baby, you sure?"

"Hell yeah."

"Okay then."

We plotted and schemed for the next two hours until it was time for them to go.

"Mom says she couldn't get on your Facebook today."

"Facebook's for friends she's no friend of mine. Put her on yours she's your mother." That bitch only friended me on Facebook to spy anyway; I blocked her ass today. I didn't say any more about it and I could tell he was not pleased but wasn't shit he could do. Little did he know that I planned to cut that bitch out of my life completely, toxic festering pustule.

"Hey why don't we take the family out to dinner since your parents are here?" I just shrugged my shoulders. Perfect, and for lands sake please pay attention this time. There was no better way for him to see the difference in the way my parents treated him compared to how I was treated. "I'll make reservations at that place your mom liked the last time she was here." I hid a secret smile, I knew for a fact Sasquatch hated that place. Too classy for her rancid ass.