Born, Darkly (Darkly, Madly 1)

His deep laugh vibrates against my legs. “I am sick. I’m lovesick. But all love is a sickness. People do things to each other…couples employing deceptive tactics to try to change one another. Make them into a better version of themselves in the name of love. We’re just more honest about it. We don’t have to sugarcoat the process.”

I shake my head. “I was fine before you happened to me.”

He places a kiss on my thigh, then stands, looming over me. “You weren’t fine, London. You were drowning.”

I watch him walk to the end of the table, and I try again to free myself from the thick thread. I can’t lose my grip on reality. I have to stay mentally strong, but I’m not sure of anything anymore—I’m not sure of myself.

Grayson returns with a folder. He drops it on the table, the contents spilling over the white tablecloth. “I couldn’t access patient files. Not without giving us away. That’s too dangerous.” He tweaks a page from the pile. “But I was able to pull this off the Internet. I hope it will suffice.”

He lays the page on my lap, the headline too bold to mistake.

“Convicted serial killer of three hangs himself in mental institution,” he reads out loud. Another page is laid on top. “Arsonist murderer found dead in cell.” Then another. “Suicide takes life of convicted rapist.”

The pages continue to stack, each headline a weight, every name a face. It builds until the pain in my head screams, and I shout, “Enough—”

Knelt before me, Grayson reaches up and touches my hair. “I love it when you wear it down.” He drapes the strands over my bare shoulders, situating the beaded shawl, his touch calming, gentle. I focus on grounding myself as a wave of nausea washes through me.

“I didn’t kill them,” I say, so low I can barely distinguish my own voice.

“No,” he says, removing the printed pages from my lap. “You didn’t kill them. You just gave them the means to kill themselves.”

The world tilts.

“Just like your most recent patient, or victim, Dale Riley.”

I blink hard, begging the world to right itself. “No. Riley transferred out of the program.”

A slanted smile steals across his face. “Is that what you call it? Transferring out. I like it. You’re exceptional, London. The way you’re able to not just lead a professional life, but thrive in it. Everyone around you, the whole world, invested in your lie. The truth is, Riley put a bullet through his head. Stole an officer’s gun and right here—” he angles two fingers under his chin “—pow.”

I turn my head, unable to look into his glacier eyes any longer.

“You see, London. Now that you’ve been shown the truth, you’ll never see the lie again. You’re liberated.”

“Liberated,” I repeat, trying to understand the meaning. The word sounds bizarre.

“No one understands you better than me. There’s no one who knows you more intimately, who will love you more passionately.” He strokes my face, then lays his hand over mine, caressing the tattooed scar along my palm. “We even mark ourselves the same. Our kills carved and inked on our flesh.”

I swallow. “I’ve only taken one life.”

His eyebrows hike. “You’ve taken six lives. Not with your own hands, you break their minds, plant a dark seed and help it grow, until your victims only have one choice.” He reaches for the knife. “We’re the same.”

My eyelids are too heavy to keep open. I let them drop as a swaying motion lulls me to some higher plane of consciousness. If I let him kill me, just end my life, I don’t have to face this truth again tomorrow. It can end here.

A sudden movement jars me back. I hear a loud tear, and my arm is freed as the thread is stripped off. I open my eyes as Grayson then uses the knife to cut my other wrist free. He places the knife in my hand.

“You’ve been denying yourself the honesty of who you are,” he says. “And I’ve been weak. I have as much to answer for as you. My victims didn’t deserve the mercy I showed them, by even giving them a choice to redeem themselves. We were put here for a reason, designed for one purpose. Now that we’ve found each other, we don’t have to yield to their laws anymore.”

I stare up at him, a beautiful, dark god towering over his own insane creations. “You’re absolutely mad.”

His smile is shattering. “I can’t wait for you to join me.”

I grip the knife, adrenaline surging.

“But, I’m giving you a choice. After this, there are no more choices. This is the finality of us.”

I glance at the darkness, then at him. My chest tingles with anticipation. “What are my options?”

“A year ago, I was stalking a man before I was taken into custody. He was going to be my next victim. Now he’s yours. My gift to you.”