Although that is required in the induction, it was more for me. Knowing just how humiliated she’d feel. And yes, when being inducted as my sub, she was supposed to be shared among the partners. That’s the agreement. That’s what keeps us equal.
I broke the covenant.
Of course, it’s within my power to do so—to assert my dominance over them—but it was a test I failed for myself. I didn’t know if I’d be able to go through with it, to allow them to touch her until that moment. And in a blinding fit of fury, I had my answer.
And now, they have theirs.
If one of them is really moving into position to advance a takeover, they know I’m vulnerable. My gambit failed. I thought I could sacrifice Alexis to them—to reestablish my dominance—but she turned out to be too great a sacrifice.
She is not a pawn to be maneuvered. She is not even a pawn to be promoted; she is already my queen.
And to my utter dread, I know the queen holds all the power.
Should they try to abuse that knowledge, however, I’ll have to remove their power. For now, I’ll need to keep Alexis under close watch.
Her slender body presses up against mine as she hesitantly lays her head on my chest. Her wet hair is bothersome at first, and I open my mouth to order her to dry it—but her scent of lavender soon douses my irritation, and I wrap my arm around her. I have to admit, though I couldn’t sleep like this, the feel of her so close and under my protection eases the rest of the lingering anxiety.
“Tonight was hard for you,” I say. It’s not a question.
She nods against me. “Yes.”
I run my fingers along her back, giving her the comforting touch she needs. “It was more difficult than it should’ve been. That is partly my fault,” I admit.
“Because they weren’t supposed to touch me.”
My eyes close as I release the tightness from my chest with a heavy breath. “No, because they were.”
She shivers as I stroke her arm, and I’m not sure if it’s due to my admission or my callused touch. Possibly both. “Once something is mine—once it belongs to me, I don’t like sharing. And ironically, I’m the one who designed the induction rule. It was meant to create an equality among the partners.”
Bravely, she rests her hand on my chest, her fingers splaying over me. “You didn’t think you’d change your mind.”
A clipped laugh slips free. “Close.” I glance down, taking her in with a hard swallow. “I don’t believe any of us are capable of change. Truthfully, I never feared that there would ever be something or someone that I’d deem valuable enough not to be shared among the partners. It was a rule I enforced more for them than myself. To keep any one of them from asserting themselves over another.” I stroke her damp hair. “It’s not within our makeup to share power.”
“Then why put men like that in charge at all?”
Good question. “Because The Firm needs dominant overseers to ensure the members obey the rules. And the law firm needs respected partners to set a standard.”
She tilts her head back, her green eyes catching the low lamplight. “I think you enjoyed asserting your dominance over them tonight.”
A crooked smile hikes my face. Relief settles me more—that I didn’t thoroughly terrify her. However, what does it mean that I terrified myself? “I enjoyed taking you from them.”
I enjoyed it far too much—to the point I nearly lost control.
The second I felt myself slip…Alexis broke through and could’ve easily pulled a switch. She could’ve demanded I do anything in that moment, and I would’ve obeyed her without question. Without thought. Willingly and helplessly. And that’s what has the monster within snapping and growling to finish her off.
She’s more of a threat than any one of the partners.
Shifting her to lie on her side, I wrap an arm around her. Content for now to keep her close. “Do you know why you cry when you’re ridiculed? When you’re embarrassed? Why the shame causes your chest to ache?”
She tenses at my abrupt change of topic. Remaining silent, she shakes her head against the pillow.
“Humiliation stimulates certain brain regions associated with physical pain,” I say. “Most people take that hurt and convert it into anger, a defense mechanism, to protect themselves. You, my unique creature, simply feel that pain. It lives inside you. That is what makes you so much more tantalizing to every top and Dom out there – you are a true submissive. You surrender to your emotions. You don’t hide from them or try to fight them. You’re a rare and delectable treat. I have never come across a more perfect, tempting woman in my existence. And that is why, from here on out, as you are mine to possess, I’m your shelter. No one will ever hurt you again. If they wound you internally, they will bleed.”
She lies still in my arms. During my speech, she barely blinked, an almost mesmerized glaze to her expression that holds me captivated. This beautiful woman is looking at me like I’m the world to behold—yet it is she who has upset my most basic beliefs.
Her fingers pull away to clasp the pendant of her necklace. “Does it have a meaning?”
How far do I take her down the rabbit hole? My actions tonight didn’t scare her—but at some point, the veil will slip too far, and there won’t be any turning back.