He rubbed his face and swore. The tension in his cock was ridiculous, and he was getting tired of jacking off. “So fucking stupid,” he muttered. “Should have just fucked Lexi and left it. ”
But no. He’d held on to her right up until she’d almost missed her flight. They’d made love all night—which he was sure was where his mistake lay. Once they’d made it into bed, the sex changed from wicked-hot fucking to…wicked-hot lovemaking. Sensual, deep, moving. The way she’d insisted on pleasing him touched a place he hadn’t fully realized existed and made the sex ten times as intense, ten times as good as it had ever been. The way he’d needed to please her had been, in hindsight, absurdly important to him. At the time, it had felt crucial, and the payoff, a delirious high.
Yeah, it had been that damn bed. It had changed everything.
He turned the key and pulled away from the curb, his mind turning toward home. An uncomfortable, heavy sensation coiled in the pit of his stomach. He loved that house, but it was so damned big. So damned empty. Usually, that worked for him. But tonight…
He’d go for a run on the beach. Yeah, that would help. Maybe jump in the ocean after. He could use a good cooldown after thinking about Lexi.
He’d taken far more swims than usual lately.
Forcing his mind toward work was easy. Business was great. He only wished he could clone himself. His guys were the best at what they did, real no-fear, no-shit, intelligent guys, but they all specialized in one area or another, making it difficult to schedule the work coming in. And Jax ended up spreading himself thin.
His work cell rang, and he picked it up. “Renegades. ”
“Jax. ” He recognized Russ Mathers’s voice instantly. “What the hell are you doing picking up the phone at this hour?”
The last time he’d talked to Russ had been the day he’d met Lexi. He was beginning to think he was cursed to live with her inside his head. “I have no life, Russ. How’s everything?”
“Good. What are you up to?”
“Just dropping off a friend. Headed home. Are you still in New York?”
“Yeah. The shoot’s going great. Those scenes you shot with Ty are epic. Seriously, Jax, wait till you see them on the big screen. You do such great work. And as much trouble as you and Ty are to have together, like two little kids loose in a damn candy store, what we got from it was worth the trouble. ”
“Give it up, Russ. You love having us together. We make you laugh your ass off. ”
“Speaking of, remember when you and Ty were screwing around and you poked him with the lance when he was looking at some babe over his shoulder and he fell off the damn horse? Then while you were laughing your ass off, he grabbed your lance and yanked you down with him?”
Just remembering the incident had Jax laughing so hard, he had to pull over before he took the freeway on-ramp. He put the truck in park and wiped his eyes. All the fun and happiness he’d had between working with Ty and Russ and being with Lexi came rushing back and filled him so completely, he hurt.
“The masters in the studio messed with that digitally,” Russ said, “and turned it into a gnarly fight scene. ”
“Oh man,” he said, his gut burning. “I needed that. ”
“I could hear it in your voice when you picked up,” Russ said. “I could tell something was bothering you weeks ago. What’s going on?”
Jax sighed, wishing he’d been able to talk to Russ about this when he’d tried—when Lexi was still with him. “Nothing, Russ. Life’s good. Work’s kicking my ass. ”
“It’s not that Veronica shit, is it?”
“No, man, I’m way over it. ”
“That’s not why I called, but did you hear—?”
“Woods got fired as the stunt coordinator on the Bond film? Yeah, believe me, I’ve heard—numerous times. ” Jax had also been dodging calls from Veronica for a couple of weeks as well. “Looks like Veronica isn’t going to get that chance to drive after all. ”
“You’re saving her life, Jax. ”
“Don’t go all dramatic on me. She’ll just go fuck someone else, eventually get her ass in a car, and kill herself. She isn’t the kind to learn from experience. ”
&
nbsp; “You didn’t used to be that kind either,” Russ said, “but I do have to say I’m proud of the way your changes over the last few years have stuck. ”
Jax’s throat tightened. It shouldn’t matter so much, but it did. And he couldn’t afford any more emotion pulling at him. “Thanks, Russ. I’m a work in progress. ”
“Aren’t we all? Don’t be surprised if Rimer calls you,” he said, referring to the producer on the Bond film. “The director is trying to take over for Woods, and it’s not working out very well. They’re about twenty million over budget on stunts. ”