He doesn’t answer right away, and I let him think in silence as I move around the table and work his other arm.
“A couple of months after Keith died,” he says, “I found out that Karen had been cheating on him.”
My hands slow. “Really?”
“Really.”
I finish working his forearm and slide my fingers between his to work out the tension in his hand. “I’m surprised this is the first time I’m hearing about that.”
Xavier is good at hiding his feelings. He puts on a strong playboy front, fun-loving, easygoing, loose, but I know there’s a lot more to him. With his friends, he’s fiercely loyal, intensely protective, and wildly generous. With me, he’s open and warm, and we often talk for hours at a time, so, yeah, I’m surprised he didn’t tell me something so obviously troubling to him.
“It annoys the piss out of me,” he says, anger leaking into his voice, “and when I talk about it, I just…”
“Get a little batshit. I understand.”
“And since she’s moved here, she’s been dating like she’s twenty again. Like she doesn’t have a fifteen-year-old daughter learning from her behavior. The worst part is that she’s always lying about it. I didn’t figure it out until months after I moved. Here I am, busting my ass—mowing the lawn, picking up Piper from school, putting groceries in their empty fridge—all while she was out there fucking some guy who doesn’t do shit for her.”
“Oh, man.” I know the feeling of being used all too well. I know without a doubt, Xavier has never had a thing for Karen, so the way Bodhi used me and the way Karen uses Xavier aren’t the same, but I can totally empathize. “I knew Karen wasn’t around much, but I thought it was because of work. Is she still a mortgage broker?”
“Yes, and it is because of work, at least partially. But she could be spending her time very differently and she’s choosing not to.”
“It’s almost like she’s cheating on you too,” I muse aloud. “Not romantically, but taking advantage of your kindness.”
“Exactly. And Piper doesn’t have her father to fall back on anymore. She’s angry at her mother for dating, hurt over losing her father, and she knows how to find trouble. It’s a disaster waiting to happen.”
“Thankfully, Piper has you." Xavier is Piper's godfather, but is considered an honorary uncle. "The way you changed your life for her is really amazing.”
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to bring you down.”
“You didn’t.” I finish working the tension from his fingers and rest his arm at his side. “Turn over, and I’ll finish up your neck.”
“Wait, what? Trish works on me
for an hour.” He looks up at me with a familiar wicked grin. Just like that, the pissed Xavier vanishes and the playboy’s back. “And you haven’t gotten to my lower body. That’s the best part.”
He never fails to make me laugh. “Best part or not, my hands are not getting anywhere remotely near your lower body. I’m not Trish, and this is a favor.”
He sighs. “Fine, but can you just see what you can do about my right glute? It’s been killing me since Misty tossed me across the pavement.”
I laugh. “Good try, handsome. Flip for me.”
“Yeah,” he hesitates. “Unless this is one of those happy-ending massages, I’m not flipping.”
Which means he’s got a hard-on. Not unusual with male clients, but somehow knowing Xavier’s got one after I’ve had my hands on him is unnerving in the most tantalizing way. “Then you’re done.”
He drops his head against the cradle. “Damn.”
I smile. “I’ll see you in the lobby.”
I’m already pulling the door open when he says, “You don’t have to leave while I change…”
I’m laughing when I pull the door closed, then I hang on to the handle for an extra second to make sure I’m steady and take a few steps backward until I can lean against the wall. I let my legs go out and slide into a crouch, hands covering my face, now damp with sweat. And it’s not from exertion. It’s from desire.
I know why so many women want him. I know why I want him. But I also know the pain of being played. Not only did I swear I’d never let that happen again, but I’m clearly not ready to take any kind of chance with my heart yet.
Forcing myself to my feet, I move behind the counter and pull up the scheduling software on the computer. Xavier comes out in his uniform pants, boots, and a white T-shirt, carrying his body armor and uniform shirt.
“When would you like to come in again?” I ask.