Chloe closes out the prayer and slips right back into the easy, upbeat speaker who welcomed everyone. She talks a little about the resort and how it came to be, explains this group is their first conference and that she’ll have lots of special surprises for them throughout their stay. She adds all the information they need for a wonderful retreat, including her personal cell phone number in case anyone has an emergency—physical, emotional, or spiritual.
I don’t love the idea that her cell number is now in the hands of three hundred strangers, but it also doesn’t surprise me that she offered it and means every word she says.
Chloe is explaining there will be hors d’oeuvres and drinks available in the next room shortly, mentions being available anytime to autograph her book, and wishes the group a peaceful and illuminating retreat.
Then she sets down the microphone and walks past Bodhi with nothing but a polite nod.
“Ouch.” This comes from Laiyla, and when I look at her, she’s wincing.
“What?”
“You’ve never been a pleaser, have you?”
“I don’t even know what that means.”
“When you’ve been conditioned to believe your value is based on how well you’re liked, what she just did—skipping the speaker introduction, putting down the mic, and walking past him as if he’s not there—probably felt like committing hari-kari to Chloe. Add to that her cell-deep belief that we are all one and that everyone deserves to be treated as we want to be treated, and the simple disrespect toward Bodhi is a double whammy for her.”
I stare at Laiyla’s profile, trying to distill all she said. “You’re saying Chloe feels bad for not introducing him.”
She laughs softly. “That’s a drastic oversimplification, but basically, yes.”
I tip my head. “Then why isn’t she concerned about having me like her?”
“Because that”—she lifts her chin toward the front where Bodhi is taking the stage—“left deep marks.”
I sigh. My hopes of getting a real shot with Chloe are dwindling, despite our freshly triggered chemistry. “How long do marks like that last?”
“Sorry, that I don’t know.”
7
Chloe
I feel like my head has finally slowed its spin. Like I can take a deep breath.
The young women I’m speaking with want to gossip, so I offer them each a business card with a discount code for three free months in my Spirit Junkie’s online membership and move on.
Gossip is something you can’t cure immediately by telling someone how it creates negative energy and hurts their ability to bring light into their lives. It’s a habit that takes work to break. And even then, it’s seductive. The ego is always trying to lure you back in to someone else’s drama so you feel better about yourself.
I take a breather from chatting and straighten up the dessert table. After two hours, the cakes, cookies, and pastries are almost gone, we’ve gone through several cases of wine, and I’m pretty wiped out.
One of the servers opens a fresh bottle of chilled Riesling, and I take a glass. Sipping, I scan the room. KT and Ben have headed home to put their girls to bed, and I pushed Laiyla and Levi out shortly after. Laiyla was exhausted from the prep and anxiety over her first big event in a realm she doesn’t completely understand and worried over how I’m dealing with Bodhi.
Bodhi is currently charming a group of attractive thirty-somethings who are hanging on his every word. Xavier, on the other hand, is laughing with a few women in their late forties, early fifties, despite being stalked and chatted up by every beautiful woman in the room.
He glances my way, catches my eye, and smiles. He’s been keeping his eye on me all night. Whenever Bodhi tries to initiate a conversation with me, Xavier’s right there, sliding his arm around my waist or taking my hand in his, threading our fingers, kissing my temple.
As I hold his gaze and return his smile, I feel something deep inside me ache for the kind of connection I’ve been avoiding for over a year. Despite starting off frustrated with him for perpetuating this false relationship, I see the wisdom in the gesture. It occurs to me that maybe he understands Bodhi better than I ever did. Xavier, after all, is an expert in liars and criminals.
But, as much as it pains me to admit, I see a change in Bodhi. He’s been respectful with my limits and hasn’t taken offense to Xavier claiming many rights Bodhi used to own exclusively. The clips of conversations I’ve picked up in passing show a man sincerely dedicated to discussing all aspects of spirituality in a personable way.
I catch glimpses of the man I fell in love with all those years ago and wonder if he’s telling the truth about changing his ways.
Xavier closes out the conversation he’s having and wanders toward me. His gaze slides directly to Bodhi, assesses, then returns to me as he approaches. “Ready to head out?”
I glance around the room and nod. I finish the wine in my glass and touch base with the resort’s catering staff before we leave.
Xavier curves his arm around my shoulders, I wrap mine at his waist, and we meander back down the main road toward my boat.