‘I’m trying not to think about the horse.’
He rolled his eyes. ‘Oh, very well. My grandparents are my family, all I’ve really known of it anyway. I have an uncle, too, my mother’s older brother, but he spends most of his time in London. As for my parents, my father died when I was eleven and my mother married again a year later.’
‘So you were never close to your father’s family? That must be the side you’ve inherited from.’
‘Yes, ironically, since they never wanted anything to do with me.’
‘Why not?’
He sighed heavily. ‘Because my father was the black sheep of his family. For very good reasons, I might add.’
‘What were they?’
‘Gambling and drinking mostly. Other vices, too, but I shan’t offend your ears by listing them all. Suffice to say, he and Ralph have certain interests in common. His family disinherited him before he even met my mother.’
‘Oh.’ She tried not to sound too shocked. ‘But she married him anyway?’
‘He was very charming by all accounts. It was a whirlwind romance, though things soured quickly after the wedding. They had a very loud marriage.’
‘Loud?’
‘Turbulent. All of my earliest memories seem to involve shouting. It was a long time before I realised that wasn’t how most people communicated. Eventually their marriage broke down and I barely saw him.’
‘Did you miss him?’
‘A great deal. He was my hero.’ He glanced back over his shoulder. ‘You have to understand, to a growing boy he was the best father you could possibly imagine, always ready to play games and make jokes. Completely irresponsible games, of course, and often dangerous, too, but I was happy. It was only much later that I realised his amusement came at the expense of everyone else around him. At the time, however, it was fun. There were no rules or constraints, so I ran wild.’
‘What happened to him?’
‘He ran away with another woman. Somebody else’s woman, unfortunately. When the husband found them he challenged him to a duel. It was my father’s fifth, but the first time he lost. He bled to death on Hampstead Heath all on his own.’
‘I’m sorry.’
‘So was I. In retrospect it was amazing he survived as long as he did, but at the time I was inconsolable. I decided the best way to pay tribute to my father was to emulate his bad behaviour so my mother packed me off to boarding school, which I hated.’
‘How sad.’ She gave him a sidelong look, sympathy now mingling with suspicion. His answers had become longer as he’d talked, as if once he’d started, he’d wanted to keep going. Overall she was starting to feel as though she understood him a bit better. As if she liked him more, too. The differences between him and Henrietta’s would-be seducer were becoming more and more obvious, but he was still a gentleman. A possible earl, even if he didn’t act in the way she expected.
‘School is where I met Ralph,’ he said, as if he’d somehow guessed the direction of her thoughts. ‘We were close companions growing up.’
‘I see.’ She paused. ‘In that case, I’m sorry for what I asked of you the other day.’
‘It was the right thing to do for your friend.’ He shrugged. ‘In any case, I’ve barely seen him over the past ten years. One day I walked out of school and never went back.’
‘You ran away?’
‘I was sixteen and a barely average student. I doubt they cared very much. I went to London, but unfortunately I found that a life of dissipation didn’t suit me. I didn’t even enjoy it very much. Which is a long and roundabout way of explaining why I joined the navy.’ He smiled. ‘I’ve been a model of good behaviour ever since. Most of the time anyway.’
‘What happened to your mother?’
He shook his head. ‘You really do ask a lot of questions, don’t you?’
‘I’m interested. Families interest me.’
‘She married again and moved to Cumberland to start a new family.’
‘Brothers and sisters?’
‘One half-sister, Susan.’