Captain Amberton's Inherited Bride (Whitby Weddings 2)
Page 86
‘She’s a romantic. What are you really doing here, Lance?’
‘I was worried about you.’
She gave a cynical half-smile. ‘My father always said he was worried about me. That’s why he kept me shut up from the world. Maybe he was right about me getting hurt, but I still wanted my freedom. I wanted it from him and now I want it from you, too. If you’ve only come because you’re worried, then you can turn around and leave. I can take care of myself.’
‘I know.’ His shadow fell over hers. ‘I also know that you’re perfectly capable of standing on your own two feet, of doing everything your father never let you, but the problem is, I’m not. I’m not capable of standing on my own any more. I’m a mess on my own. I was a mess before I married you, and I’m a mess again now. I can’t be without you, Violet.’
‘You said you wanted a divorce.’
‘I say a lot of stupid things. When I saw Arthur, I panicked. I was so happy to see him again, but when I thought about what it might mean for us...’
‘For my inheritance?’
‘Hang your inheritance! I don’t give a damn about the money! I’ve been a fool. I thought I was doing the right thing by letting you go, but I’ve never been good at doing the right thing and I can’t start now, not if it means losing you. But you were right last night, I’m not the man I was. You’ve changed me. You’ve made me a better man and I’ll spend the rest of my life being good and honourable and everything else I ought to be, if you’ll only forgive me. I didn’t mean what I said, Violet.’
Her heart lifted. He hadn’t meant it, he didn’t want a divorce, yet the memory of the words still hurt. She braced a hand against the wall, holding herself steady.
‘You know, when my father died, I felt like I’d finally been let out of prison. I didn’t want any man to control me ever again. I wanted to find out who I was instead. I married you because you offered me the freedom to find out, but somehow I gave you control anyway. I gave you the power to hurt me because I was happy with you. I didn’t want to go travelling again because I started to feel like I had a home, a real home of my own at last. I didn’t feel small and powerless and trapped any more. Even though our marriage was all based on the money, it felt like it was becoming more than that. Last night felt like more than that.’
‘It was more than that. Yes, I married you for the money, but it was the best mistake I ever made, the right decision for all the wrong reasons. And if we lose it all now, I don’t care. The estate won’t collapse, nor will the mine. It’ll take us longer to make a profit, but we’ll succeed eventually. As for the house, it’s supposed to look like a castle. A few more crumbling walls won’t hurt.’ He rested his hand on the stone next to hers. ‘I know you like them this way.’
She moved her fingers slightly towards his. ‘You remember that?’
‘You were coming here the first time you ran away from me—how could I forget that? You said your mother had a picture book of York.’
‘Now I know why. She was born here.’
‘Ianthe said you were coming to find your aunt.’
‘Yes.’ She reached her little finger out and brushed it gently against his hand. ‘I was planning to go straight to her house, but...I can’t seem to move.’
‘Why?’ His voice sounded faintly husky.
‘Because I feel trapped again. When you said we should get a divorce it made everything I’d felt seem like a lie, as if the person I’d become was a lie, too.’ She turned around at last, pressing her back against the wall to look at him. ‘I don’t want it all to have been a lie.’
‘None of it was a lie, Violet, I swear it. You’re not a lie. You’re the woman I love.’
‘You love me?’ She felt breathless suddenly.
‘Yes. I should have told you last night. I love you so much that I’ll walk the whole length of these walls on my bad leg if it’ll prove it to you.’
‘It’s two miles.’
‘Then it might take me a day or two.’ He took a step closer towards her. ‘I don’t expect you to say you love me back. Just come home with me, Violet. Please.’
‘No.’ She shook her head and his face fell. ‘I need to find my aunt, to find out why she kept away all these years.’
‘If that’s what you want.’ His voice sounded strained. ‘I want you to be happy, Violet.’
‘Thank you.’ She hesitated for another moment and then reached out, clasping his hands in the way he’d held hers on the promenade just before their wedding. ‘But after that, I’d like you to take me home.’
‘You do?’
‘Yes.’ Her heart clenched at the hopeful look on his face. ‘On condition that you never try to do the right thing ever again, not without checking with me first. You’re not very good at it.’
‘I know.’ Amber eyes lit up with laughter.
‘As for my inheritance...’