‘Yes—’ his brows contracted even further ‘—but as the landowner, I have other responsibilities and it’s time I faced up to them. Lance and I have been dealing with the estate together for the past few years, but what with the ironworks and a family, he doesn’t have a great deal of spare time any more. I should never have expected so much of him, but then I never intended to come back here. I intended for all of this to be his and his children’s.’
‘And now?’
‘Now Violet and Lance have bought a new house closer to the ironworks, so I’m back.’ He stood up again, his expression resolute. ‘And I intend to stay back.’
‘You mean you’re going to start behaving like a viscount again?’ She clasped her hands in front of her, trying to create a barrier between them as he moved closer.
‘Something like that.’ He lifted an eyebrow sardonically. ‘Within reason anyway.’
‘Oh.’ She pursed her lips, unsure about what kind of expression she ought to be wearing. She felt strangely giddy all of a sudden. He was the self-assured, confident man from the promenade again, the one who’d asked her to marry him, told her she was beautiful and made her believe it, too. The one she still found irresistible despite everything...
‘I see.’ She cleared her throat, forcing herself to remember how he’d changed. ‘How do you feel about it all?’
‘Not too bad, surprisingly. The roof hasn’t caved in yet and I haven’t felt the slightest inclination to throw myself into the North Sea.’
‘Don’t joke.’
‘I’m not, not really. Only I’ve decided to stop taking myself so seriously. You were right when you said that guilt didn’t do any good. So I’m back, living in my father’s house and sitting in his chair to make peace with him. I’ve decided to make things right, as far as I can anyway. I’m taking over the estate like he wanted me to, but I’m doing it my way, not his. That’s the best I can do.’
She clasped her hands tighter, trying not to notice how exceedingly handsome he looked, though the resolute look in his eye was strangely compelling.
‘Then I’m pleased for you. I hope you’ll be very happy h
ere.’
‘I won’t be, not without you.’ His voice held a note of conviction. ‘Besides, it’s too big a house for one man. It needs a mistress.’
‘Well, if you’re going to behave like a viscount again then I’m sure you’ll have no trouble finding someone.’
‘I don’t want someone, Frances. I want you.’
‘No.’ She tensed as he moved closer, his proximity making her pulse start to flutter unsteadily. ‘It’s too late for that.’
‘Why?’ He reached a hand out. ‘Tell me why you broke off our engagement, the real reason this time.’
‘How can you ask me that?’ She was almost relieved to feel angry again, batting his hand away accusingly. ‘How dare you when you were the one who changed your mind about us? I saw it in your eyes. You were the one who wanted to end our engagement! Or do you deny it?’
He hesitated for a moment and then shook his head. ‘No. I can’t deny it.’
‘Oh.’ She gasped for breath, feeling as though she’d fallen into deep water suddenly. Even though she’d suspected the truth, hearing it from his own lips felt even more painful, as if she were sinking slowly beneath the surface with the force of the waves pushing her downwards.
‘In that case, there’s nothing else to say.’ She started towards the door, desperate to get away from him and out into the open air again.
‘There’s plenty to say.’ Arthur stepped around her, blocking her path. ‘Yes, I intended to call off our engagement that day, but I knew the moment you started speaking that it wasn’t what I wanted, not really.’
‘So it was just a whim?’ She gave a brittle laugh.
‘No. Look, I was a damned fool in the way that I acted and an even bigger fool not to come to my senses sooner. My only excuse is that I was afraid. I’ve been afraid for a long time, mostly of myself, of what happened six years ago and the chances of it happening again. I’ve been so afraid of the past repeating itself that I’ve been jumping at shadows. I thought I was free, but I was only making another prison for myself. I should have told you the whole truth before. I intended to, but I thought—hoped—that I’d moved on, that I was stronger. Then after what happened to Violet and then Lydia, I panicked. I did the very thing I was afraid of and ran away.’
‘You were afraid?’ She felt as though she were rising to the surface of the water again, her heart aching at the thought of what he must have suffered. ‘I thought it was because you still had feelings for Lydia.’
‘No. I was worried about her, of course, but that wasn’t the reason I behaved so badly. I was scared that I wouldn’t be able to cope if anything like that happened to you. I pushed you away because I was afraid of how I might react, of running away again and hurting you. I thought that breaking our engagement was for the best, but I’ve been miserable every moment since.’ He reached for one of her hands, clasping it between both of his and pressing a kiss against the knuckles. ‘Frances, if it was my behaviour that ruined everything, then at least give me a chance to mend it...please.’
‘No.’ She hardened her heart at the imploring look on his face. ‘I’m glad that you’ve found a way to come home, but I can’t be part of it. I’ve moved on. My jewellery is selling well and people value my work. They value me. I’m making a life for myself on my own.’
‘Frances...’
‘No.’ She shook her head adamantly. ‘I trusted you. I thought that you were nothing like Leo, but you rejected me just the same. I won’t be hurt like that again.’