Redeeming Her Viking Warrior

‘I’m still not happy about it, but I’m grateful. For all of it. And all those things I said before, about not leaving... I shouldn’t have. I overreacted. If you want to live in the forest alone, then that’s your choice, not mine. I’ve no right to tell you how to live or to demand to stay. My only excuse is that I was frightened of losing you.’ He twisted his face to one side, a muscle tightening in his jaw. ‘I’ve never been so frightened in my life, but then I’ve never felt this way about anyone before. I never wanted to. I always thought that love led to pain, but now I think I was just waiting for the right woman to come along and find me bleeding to death in the wilderness.’ He gave a half-smile. ‘But I do understand what you meant about safety being important. When I thought Joarr might hurt you... I never want to feel that way again.

‘It’s safer not to love, not to risk being hurt. Maybe that’s what I’ve been doing with women my whole life, but that’s not the way I want to live any more. I want to be with you, to share my life with you, to make the most of every moment together. I’m not saying you can’t manage on your own, just that you don’t have to. I’m saying that I want to help to look after you, too. There must be a few things I’m good for and whatever they are, whatever you want, I’ll do them. Because I love you, Sissa. I’ve never said those words to any other woman in my life, but I mean them. I love everything about you. Your strength, your courage, your wild hair. When I’m with you I feel right, like I’m where I’m supposed to be. If you still want me to go, then I’ll go, but if you let me come back then I swear I’ll be as faithful and loyal as Halvar. I’ll probably still talk too much, but I’ll make up for it in other ways.’ He paused for breath finally. ‘What do you think, could you bear to live with a man who loves you? And cooks?’

She opened her mouth and then closed it again. Could she bear all of that? Yes. More than that, she wanted it. It all sounded so perfect, but that made it even more dangerous...

‘Sissa...’ He frowned when she didn’t answer. ‘You told me once that you survived for your mother, because it’s what she would have wanted, but wouldn’t she have wanted you to be happy and loved, too? Just give me a chance. That’s all I ask.’

She tensed as an image of her mother’s face flashed into her mind. After all these years, the emotions it evoked were bittersweet. There was sadness, yes, but there was also love and, in the end, that was the strongest feeling of all. Losing her parents would have been easier if she hadn’t loved them, but then she would have missed one of the greatest feelings in life. Without that love—the memory of it—she wouldn’t have survived. It was the reason she’d survived, but it was Danr who’d brought her back to life again. And if she let him go, then the rest of her life would just be about survival. He was right; that wasn’t the life her mother would have wanted for her.

‘I always did talk too much.’ He inclined his head when she still didn’t answer. ‘Goodbye, Sissa.’

‘Wait.’ She put her hand on his arm as he started to turn away. Despite all of her fears, he was right—and she couldn’t let him go. ‘I overreacted, too. I was scared of caring for you because I was frightened of losing you the way I lost everyone else I cared about, but isn’t that foolish, to send a person away because you’re afraid of losing them? I’d lose you anyway.’

‘It sounds foolish to me.’ His eyes flickered with hope as he took a cautious step back towards her.

‘And I can’t go back to the way I lived before anyway. People know I can talk now. Things can’t ever be the same any more.’

‘I’m sorry.’

‘I’m not.’ She slid her hand down his arm until her fingers met his. ‘I’m glad. I’m glad I found you bleeding in the wilderness, Danr Sigurdsson. I’m glad you wouldn’t let me send you away. I’m glad because...’ She stopped and bit her lip. She still couldn’t say that she loved him, not yet, but she could say the next best thing. ‘Because I want you to come back. Once you’ve fulfilled your oath, I want you to come back and be my mate.’ She smiled as he clasped both of her hands, lifting them to his lips and covering them in kisses.

‘Anything you want. Only marry me first.’

‘What?’

‘Marry me. Be my mate in truth. Tonight, before I leave.’

‘Tonight?’ She gaped at him. ‘But I only just... Why so quickly?’

‘Because I want to prove what I just said to you. I want you to know that I meant every word. I don’t know how long it will take me to fulfil my oath to my brothers, but I want to make another to you. I want you and everyone to know that I’m coming back, even if I have to swim the sea with one arm.’ He clasped her hands tighter. ‘I’ll come back and I won’t ever tell you how to live your life again. We’ll make decisions together.’

‘All right, I’ll marry you.’ She laughed incredulously. ‘Tonight.’

‘Hilda?’ He called out his stepmother’s name though he didn’t take his eyes off Sissa.

‘Well, I’m glad to see you took my advice for once.’ Hilda emerged from the hall to join them.

‘I did...’ he smiled ‘...and excellent advice it was. Now, what would you say to planning a wedding feast tonight?’

‘I’d say don’t be ridiculous. It’ll be dark before long.’

‘But can it be done?’

‘It could.’ Hilda’s jaw dropped as she looked between them. ‘You mean...? Stars, Danr, you never do anything by half.’ She reached for Sissa’s arm, pulling her away. ‘Come on, we’ll go straight to the bathhouse.’

‘What? Why?’ Sissa looked at her in surprise.

‘Because it’s tradition. One of them anyway. We won’t have time for most of the others, but we’ll do our best. We only have a few hours.’

‘No, we have one hour.’

Danr’s voice was firm. ‘If I’m leaving tomorrow, then I want to spend as much time as possible during the rest of today with my wife.’ His gaze fastened on hers. ‘One hour, then we’ll be married.’

* * *

An hour, Danr discovered, could be a long time. A very long time, especially when a man had just declared his love, was leaving imminently and when every moment was precious. Short of storming the bathhouse, however, there wasn’t much he could do about it, especially when Joarr, Knut and half-a-dozen other warriors insisted that he perform his own purifying ritual with a bracing dip in the sea loch. Still, he had to concede it was all worth the sacrifice when he caught his next glimpse of Sissa. She looked breathtaking, dressed in an ankle-length blue gown with a pale yellow over-tunic, held in place by two silver brooches at the shoulders and with a loop of amber beads slung between. Her hair had been combed into submission, too, topped with a silver bridal crown in the shape of intertwining leaves that made her look even more like a forest queen.

The wedding ceremony itself was brief, with a simple exchange of rings, and the celebrations muted at his request. After what had happened in Maerr, weddings themselves had lost their appeal for him and it was hard to celebrate after what they’d just discovered about Kolga and Thorfinn. More than that, he didn’t want Sissa to feel any more uncomfortable than she obviously already did around so many people. The tension in her body had been clear all through the ceremony. When he’d slid the wedding band over her finger, it had felt stiff as wood.