Besieged and Betrothed

He nodded and glanced away, as if giving her a chance to control herself. ‘Ulf gave him some of your remedy. At least now I know why you keep such powerful medicines to hand.’

She brushed a hand across her eyes. ‘I don’t want to give them to him. I want him to wake up and be himself again, but he’s confused and in pain more and more. I can’t bear to see that.’ She paused. ‘Do you think it’s wrong of me?’

‘No. You’re taking care of him.’

‘I’m trying to.’

‘For what it’s worth, I’m sorry I accused you of anything else.’

‘Thank you.’

She took a chair on the opposite side of the bed, watching him from beneath her lashes. His eyes were hooded, though she could sense that he was still watching her, too. She had the impression that they were both seeing each other in a new light.

‘I thought you were leaving.’

‘So did I.’ He leaned back in his chair and sighed. ‘We seem to go around in circles, Lady Juliana. First you imprison me, then you release me, then I imprison you and now...’ He blew air from between his teeth. ‘Is there anything else you’ve neglected to tell me about? Is Stephen hiding in one of your stables?’

‘No.’ She smiled despite herself.

‘Good. Because I don’t want any more lies between us. We’re in this together now.’

‘What do you mean?’ She looked up again hopefully. Had he changed his mind about sending her to Matilda for punishment then? Was he going to help her? He was regarding her levelly.

‘I’m still here, aren’t I?’

‘What about Sir Guian?’

‘He’s gone.’

‘Gone?’

His lips twitched. ‘He was as surprised about it as you are. I sent him back to the Empress.’

‘But won’t he tell her about my father?’

‘He can’t tell her something he doesn’t know. That’s why I sent him away.’

‘You mean...’ She could hardly believe what she was hearing. ‘You mean you’re not telling her?’

‘No, I’m just not telling her yet. Some news is best delivered in person. For the time being, this is our secret.’

She felt a flicker of something like triumph, as if she’d just won an important piece in a game of chess. She wasn’t sure who she was playing against, but she’d won the piece all the same. He’d chosen to stay with her rather than rush back to Matilda. Not that she understood why...

‘Surely you could have left me here with Sir Guian while you told her?’ She tried to sound uninterested.

‘I could have.’ He gave her a look that she couldn’t interpret. ‘But I didn’t. I owe your father better than that.’

‘Oh. Yes.’ A stab of guilt mingled with disappointment. Of course he’d stayed for her father—just as he should have. It was selfish of her to hope otherwise. Her father was what mattered after all, not this strange attraction, or whatever it was, she seemed to feel towards Lothar.

‘Then I’m grateful. I know I don’t deserve your help, but l thank you for it anyway.’

He leaned forward suddenly, resting his forearms on his knees as he fixed her with a hard stare.

‘Why didn’t you tell me? The rest I can understand, but not that. What was the point of still pretending your father was dead after you surrendered? I told you he was my friend. Why didn’t you ask me for help?’

‘Because I didn’t need help.’ The words came out by habit.

‘You were half-killing yourself taking care of him. What use would you have been to anyone then?’