‘It would make things a lot easier if you did.’
‘I don’t care what she thinks of me.’
‘She has the power to let you stay in your home or cast you out of it. You might consider that.’
‘You’d let her cast your wife out?’
‘I might if she were behaving like a stubborn shrew.’
‘Shrew?’
‘In any case, I’m leaving you in command.’
‘Me?’ She started in surprise.
He nodded. ‘Despite what you think, I’ve no wish to take anything from you. I’ve already told you, you’re an excellent chatelaine. I can’t think of anyone I’d trust more.’
She swallowed, fighting back a swell of emotion. Did he truly mean it? He seemed to, standing so close to her now that she could feel the warmth of his body against hers. Despite everything, she found herself wanting to move closer still, to lean her head against his chest and wrap her arms around him...
‘What about Stephen?’ She pushed the temptation away. ‘What if he comes back when you’re away?’
‘He won’t. He’s gone back to Winchester.’
‘Oh.’ She was surprised by her own lack of reaction. In truth, the news didn’t bother her half as much as she would have expected. If Stephen wasn’t coming, then she wouldn’t be forced to make any difficult decisions about her allegiance. That was a relief more than anything. She might not want to be married, but she didn’t want to side against her new husband either.
‘My men will be under your command while I’m gone.’
She blinked. ‘They’re not going with you?’
‘Only two of them. The rest will stay here to protect you.’
‘But only two? Is that safe?’
He looked faintly amused. ‘I’ve accomplished far more perilous feats on my own, I assure you.’
‘So...’ her stomach lurched again ‘...you’re coming back?’
‘I intend to. I apologise if that’s not the answer you were hoping for, but I made a promise to your father.’
Her heart lifted briefly and then plummeted again. He was coming back, but only because of the promise he’d made to her father. That was the only reason he’d come back—nothing to do with her. Not that she wanted it to be for her, she reminded herself, but he’d made a promise to her, too! He’d said that they’d look after her father together. She’d told him that she didn’t want his help, but that last day had still felt like a respite. Knowing that there was someone to help her, someone to share the burden with, she’d felt some of the weight of the past few months lift from her shoulders. She’d actually sta
rted to rely on him and now he was leaving. Barely an hour since they’d uttered their marriage vows and he was leaving. Had he meant any of it? She hadn’t wanted to marry him, but at least she’d gone through with it for the right reasons, to fulfil her father’s last wishes. If Lothar could leave her so easily, then surely that proved he’d only married her for Haword. Now that he’d received word Stephen wasn’t coming, he had no qualms about abandoning her and her father. He was more than happy to go running back to Matilda.
‘I’ve been summoned.’ He seemed to sense her resentment. ‘I can’t refuse, especially now.’
‘No.’ She supposed that was true...
‘I only have one request while I’m gone.’ He drew Matilda’s ring off his little finger again. ‘You might not wish to wear it, but men know that it’s mine. It might come in useful if you ever have to vouch for yourself.’
‘Why would I need to do that?’ She narrowed her eyes suspiciously.
‘Because truthfully, I don’t know what’s going to happen. There’s rarely fighting during the winter, but given the circumstances, there’s a chance.’
She frowned, remembering what her father had taught her about politics. ‘Because the Empress won’t want to appear weakened by the Earl’s death. She might feel the need to assert her power.’
He looked impressed. ‘It’s possible. If she does, then there’ll be risks.’
She nodded fearfully. Bad enough that he was only taking two guards with him on the dangerous road to Devizes. The thought of him being in a battle made her feel ill. No matter how angry she was with him, she didn’t want him to get hurt. Now that it came to it, she didn’t want him to leave either.