‘Maybe if I tell him...’
‘You’ll tell him nothing!’ Svend rounded on her fiercely. ‘You’ll stay as far away from William FitzOsbern as possible.’
She caught her breath. He looked severe, but there was something else in his expression too—something she’d never seen or expected to see there before. Fear.
‘I need you to promise me, Aediva.’ Svend set his jaw firmly. ‘I’ll talk to FitzOsbern.’
‘I promise.’ She was almost afraid to ask her next question. ‘Will he punish you?’
‘Perhaps.’
‘But...he won’t take Redbourn away?’
‘Possibly.’
‘No!’ Her throat tightened on a sob. ‘Svend, I’m so sorry. I never meant for you to lose your reward. I know what it means to you.’
‘What?’ He stared at her for a long moment. ‘Hell’s teeth, Aediva, do you ever listen to a word I say? I don’t care about my reward!’
‘You don’t?’
‘I want a home! That means with you. If I had half of England it wouldn’t mean anything without you. You’re my reward!’
She clambered over the bed, her heart brimming with happiness, but he held his hands up as if to fend her off.
‘It’s too late for us.’
‘What?’ She sat down again abruptly, her blood turning to ice. ‘You said that you trusted me.’
‘I did. I do. I knew you didn’t go with Edmund willingly, but you still went to him when I had asked you not to.’ He shook his head. ‘I thought we could build a future together, but we have different allegiances. Yours almost got you killed. I’ve lost everything before, but when I thought I’d lost you... I can’t go through that again. We should go our separate ways.’
She stared at him hopelessly, shuddering at the note of finality in his voice. He was bidding her farewell—sending her back to the old life he thought she still wanted. Except that she didn’t want it. Not any more.
And how dared he tell her that she did?
How dared he give up on them so easily?
‘So you’re sending me away because you’re afraid of losing me?’
‘I can’t live with you when I don’t know whose side you’re on.’
‘Yours! Ours!’ She felt a rush of anger. ‘I only went behind your back because you gave me no choice. You wouldn’t even let me talk to Edmund. If you had then none of this would have happened.’
‘So it was my fault?’
‘Yes, in part. I’m Saxon—you know that. You can’t expect me to turn my back on my people just because you say so. I’m not one of your soldiers to be ordered around, and you can’t make decisions for me. We need to work things out together, find a new way—somewhere between Saxon and Norman.’
‘There isn’t—’
‘Why did you come after me if you were just going to give up? Why did you almost kill yourself to save me?’
‘Because I love you! But that’s not the point!’
‘Yes, it is! If you truly love me then you won’t give up, no matter what. If we give up now then it’s all hopeless. Edmund will have won. And if you think—’
She didn’t get any further as he swept her into his arms, closing her mouth with his with a fervour that took her breath away.
‘Aediva.’ He broke the kiss finally. ‘You’re the most infuriating woman I’ve ever known.’