‘Four turmae. That’s more than a hundred riders, Ario included, and we’re only going to take a look around. There won’t be any fighting if we can help it.’
‘Just don’t take any unnecessary risks.’
‘I’ve no intention of doing so, especially now.’ He reached a hand out, rubbing his knuckles gently across her cheek as she drew in a ragged-sounding breath.
‘I’ll hold you to that.’
‘What about you?’ He skimmed his thumb lightly across the bridge of her nose. ‘Will you be all right?’
‘Yes. There’s lots to be done here. Don’t think about me.’
He turned his hand over and drew a red tendril away from her face. How could he say that he couldn’t help but think about her, that ever since they’d met he’d done little else? Her round face looked even more beautiful in the moonlight, her earlier nervousness replaced with concern. She looked as if she truly cared about whether or not he came back. How ironic that now, for the first time in all the weeks he’d been asking Nerva to let him lead a patrol, he didn’t want to go. He wanted to stay with her. His groin stirred again at the thought. At that moment, he wanted nothing more than to lean in and kiss her so thoroughly that she wouldn’t have either the time or leisure to become nervous about sleeping with him. In fact, if it was speed he wanted, then that shouldn’t be a problem. He already felt close to bursting.
Not that he wanted their first encounter to be in a courtyard, he admonished himself. He’d rather carry her to bed first and start their marriage properly. There would be time for more imaginative ideas later. They’d have to find more furniture from somewhere...
He slid his hand down and around the back of her neck and then stopped, struck by the distinct feeling that something wasn’t right. She already seemed nervous again—tense, even—the muscles in her neck palpitating beneath his fingertips. Was it the marriage bed itself she felt tense about? Or the idea of him in it? From what she’d just told him, her married life had been a long way from happy. He’d stopped her from explaining the reasons why her husband had accused her of infidelity, but perhaps he shouldn’t have. Now, too late, he had the distinct suspicion that she’d wanted to tell him, as if she’d needed to almost, as if, even though she wasn’t grieving, she was still recovering from the after-effects of her marriage. Perhaps she needed time to recover from those. Which meant that he couldn’t rush her, no matter how much he wanted to.
He wondered if it were too late to visit the frigidarium...
‘Marius?’ She looked strangely resolute all of a sudden. ‘There’s something I need to tell you...’
* * *
‘There’s only one bed.’
They weren’t the words she’d intended to say. They weren’t even the words she was thinking of, though she supposed some part of her brain must have been thinking about bed—how could it not when he’d been looking at her so intently?—but they definitely weren’t part of the speech she’d been planning.
She’d spent the afternoon preparing both the house and herself, reciting the words over and over in her mind until she knew them by heart. She’d made a promising start, she’d thought, telling him the truth about her marriage to Julius, but it was still only a small part of the whole story. Ironically, he’d stopped her from telling the rest, saying he only wanted to know if she wanted to tell him. Now she almost felt angry. Why did he have to be so honourable all of the time? Why couldn’t he just demand to know the truth?
‘Ah.’ He looked faintly surprised by her statement, too. ‘Ario did say there wasn’t much furniture.’
‘Yes.’ She swallowed, wondering what on earth had possessed her to start a conversation about their sleeping arrangements now. With one bed, it wasn’t as if they had many options, but if they were going to share it then she definitely had to s
peak up first!
‘It’s not very big.’ Her nerve failed her again. ‘But I’ve made it up ready...for you.’
‘Just for me?’ His eyes seemed even darker than the dusk around them. ‘No, you take it. I’m used to sleeping on the floor.’
‘No.’ She shook her head adamantly. Coward as she was, she wasn’t going to make him suffer for it. ‘I can’t let you do that, especially if you’re riding north in the morning.’
‘I insist.’
She chewed her lip. Clearly he wasn’t going to back down. In which case, she’d have to try something else. Another lie to make matters worse... She stood up and stretched her arms out to the sides, feigning a yawn. ‘In that case, we ought to share it. It’s big enough and we’re both tired. I know I am.’ Another yawn for good measure. ‘I’m sure I could sleep for a week.’
‘Is that so?’ There was a cynical edge to his voice suddenly.
‘Yes. I’ll just clean up first.’
‘Can I help?’
‘No.’ She picked up a jug of water and doused the fire, avoiding his gaze as studiously as she had when he’d first arrived and she’d been building herself up to her speech. ‘It won’t take me long. You go ahead.’
‘Very well.’ He picked up a lantern in one hand and his wine in the other. ‘Which room?’
‘That one.’ She pointed quickly over her shoulder, waiting for him to close the door before smacking a hand to her forehead and rebuking herself for cowardice. Why hadn’t she told him? It had been the perfect opportunity. They’d been alone with no danger of interruptions, for once, and he’d been in a relaxed mood, one she’d done her best to bolster with food and wine. There had even been a feeling of intimacy sitting on the wall beside him, close enough that all her nerve endings had seemed to positively throb with awareness. There had been a strange look on his face, too, when she’d admitted that she hadn’t loved Julius, one almost like relief, as if he’d been pleased by the fact. She should have told him everything right then, but she’d shied away at the last moment, telling herself the timing still wasn’t right. After all, he was leaving at first light, so he’d said, heading into enemy territory for who knew how long, and she hadn’t wanted him to leave on an argument.
She washed the bowls out, gratified to find his was empty, and then made her way through to the cubicula. It wasn’t the biggest, but it was the most habitable of all the bedrooms, with a tattered-looking chair, a scratched chest and a medium-sized bed pushed up against the wall. With any luck, Marius would be in there already. If he was already asleep, then she’d only have to crawl in beside him...