The Complete Rockstar Series

“Right. Sorry. I had loads to do with classes and midterms and what not.” I squirm uncomfortably at my teammates’ scrutiny. Or maybe it’s my imagination and they’re not looking at me oddly at all. This is my first outing since… it happened, and what little self-confidence I had built up, evaporated like an oasis in the desert.

“Well. Midterms are over, so you’ll have plenty of time to hang out with us now.” Brittany smiles at me from across the cozy living room. “And I did not make out with Bud,” she insists. Everyone starts chattering, refuting her claim. Brittany holds up a hand to silence them. “I got a piece of his hot ass!”

The room erupts into giggles and girlish squeals, the sounds of friends having a laugh. I force a smile on my face, pretending to fit in when I know deep down I’ll never fit in with this crowd again. I won’t drink, I won’t date, and I sure as hell won’t ever set foot inside a frat house again.

I get up and escape to the tiny kitchen, desperate to stop trembling before anyone can notice that I’m falling apart.

“Hey.”

I startle, knocking over a half-full glass of something pink.

“Sorry Kate. I didn’t mean to frighten you.” Myriah grabs a kitchen roll and starts to mop up the mess.

“No worries,” I lie, crouching down to help.

“What’s been going on with you?” Myriah asks as she tosses the soggy towels in the bin. “You’ve been avoiding us lately.”

“Have I?” I concentrate on wiping up the now non-existent spill to avoid looking at my friend. “Just busy with classes, that’s all.”

“Kate.”

Noise and laughter from the other room breaks the uncomfortable silence. Myriah’s pause is long enough that I can’t get away with any more fake cleaning, the spill already gone. I stand up, leaning back on the counter to face my team captain.

“I’ve just…” My eyes begin to fill with tears. “Crap. Sorry.” I wipe them away with the back of my hand. “I’m going through some stuff, okay?”

Myriah’s concerned gaze meets mine, her face slightly blurry through my tears.

“Is this about that guy you used to see? The famous one? Because of the new T.V. show?”

My heart stutters, skipping a beat. “The what?”

“The reality show. You know, Life With Lila?”

“Life with—what? No. What are you talking about?” Lila? She can’t be talking about Lila Griffin, my psycho ex-flatmate. Can she?

“The new show on the CelebCast channel. Life With Lila. It’s all about that rich socialite from around here, Lila Griffin.”

At the mention of her name, my throat begins to close up.

“I thought maybe you saw it and got upset. Because Dax Davies is with her now.”

“No way!” I say louder than I intended.

Myriah shrinks back, surprised by the vehemence of my words. She holds her hands up. “If you say so, Kate. Just, if you’re going through a rough time, call me. We can hang out.”

“Yeah, I will,” I choke out.

No. I won’t.

As soon as it’s possible to escape without anyone noticing, I hurry back to my flat and boot up my laptop, trembling all over. While I wait for it to go through it’s painfully slow process, my mind begins to wander.

Dax and Lila aren’t really together, are they? He said he hated her—despised her. I believed him when he told me that all of those photos of them together on tour were set

up. But then… why did he break up with me? Was it to be with her? Was he with her while we were together?

My head begins to hurt from the possibilities.

The home screen finally pops up. I choose a search engine and type