It’s a lie. I do want to use her. Take her flesh and pound away my guilt into oblivion. But while Killer revels in the thought of holding her down and taking his pleasure, that teeny-tiny human side, the side only Britt can bring out, hates the thought of treating her like another hole to fuck. A release. A way to forget. She’s so, so much more than that.
Britt takes the final step, closing the gap between us. She curls her hands around my neck and gazes up at me. I can do nothing but stare back at her, trapped by those stunning blue eyes. I study them, the emotions in their depths, and that’s when I finally get it.
Britt needs this as much as I do. Whatever her demons are, they rival mine in their magnitude. The pain and desperation I see in those sapphire eyes reflect what I see in the mirror every single day.
When I finally allow my mind to give in to desire, lust explodes bright white and hot, eclipsing everything else in my overworked brain. I thread my hands into the silky hair at the back of her neck and tilt her head back. “Last chance to say no, Britt,” I growl, my fingers tightening on her scalp as my body vibrates with need.
Britt licks her lips and my cock throbs painfully. “Take me, Keller. Make me yours again.”
The sound that comes rumbling out of my chest can only be described as primal as my mouth crashes down on hers. The joining is passionate, teeth, tongue, and lips, hot and wet, sliding together in desperation. One of my hands skims down her back to grip her round ass, crushing her soft groin against my rigid length. Britt moans into my mouth and I lose any semblance of restraint.
Tearing my mouth away, I bite down on her lower lip and tug on it before releasing her. “Bedroom, now,” I rasp. Britt doesn’t move, her eyes hazy with lust. “Right now,” I growl, taking her by the shoulders and spinning her to face the bedroom. I land a sharp crack across her firm buttocks, eliciting a squeal as Britt hurries down the hall. She peeks into several open doors before finding the right one.
Following a few steps behind, I pause in the doorway to rein in my urges, Britt standing near the bed. Slowly, she turns to face me. I take in my fill, my eyes slowly roving up and down her perfect body, remembering how every inch tasted, how it felt beneath my hands. Britt inhales and whispers one shaky word. “Keller.”
The sound of my name on her lips does something to the damaged man inside. I haven’t been Keller in so long. I haven’t wanted to be him. But having Britt, gorgeous and willing in my room, seeing the raw emotions in her eyes—desire, adoration, trust—makes me long for things I shouldn’t. Things I don’t deserve. But I’m weak. The chance to feel something again is too tempting. The anniversary, the alcohol, the pain of not being with Britt… the remainder of my walls collapse into a pile of rubble at her feet.
“Britt,” I rasp, never needing anything as much as I need her.
I
step forward, pulling Britt into my arms, kissing her lips, her throat, across her collarbone. Nose to nose, I grasp the hem of her shirt. She raises her arms, giving herself to me completely. The magnitude of her gift, her trust, makes me breathless. I tug off the fabric, tossing it aside to quickly work off the rest of her clothes.
Once she’s naked, Britt reaches out, sliding her fingers along the waistband of my loose athletic pants. The feather-light touch across my abs sends chills up my spine, my skin a riot of sensation. “Fuck.” The curse slips free as my head falls back. I stand still, allowing Britt to undress me, allowing her the same level of trust she gave me. Small hands dig under the fabric at my lower back. Britt grabs the firm globes of my ass, kneading and squeezing them, exploring every inch as we grind together.
“I want you. I need you,” she murmurs as she licks a path up my throat to my jaw.
“Jesus, Britt. I… I never…” Words fail me. I hardly ever feel emotions let alone put them in words. There are no words to describe what Britt does to me.
“Shhhhhh,” she whispers, stroking the side of my face. “I know. I feel it too.”
I swallow, the lump in my throat making it difficult to speak. My eyes burn as this girl, this amazing woman, makes me feel more with one sentence than I’ve felt in ten years. Makes me feel… worthy.
Britt pushes my pants down and I kick them to the side. Both of us naked, we spend time standing pressed together, our hands wandering as our mouths and tongues explore. When my body begins to hum with electricity and my balls grow heavy, I gently push her back on the mattress. Britt lies down, pulling me with her.
When I line up and enter her hot depths, our eyes connected, I know without a doubt this single moment is going to change my life. This will either be my salvation or cause my complete destruction.
This will be the first time I’ve ever made love to another person, and I pray to god I’m strong enough to come through it unscathed.
Britt
When Keller joins his body with mine, everything in my world becomes clear, focused… right. As much as I need the controlling pain-pleasure Keller brings me, somehow, he instinctively knows that today I need to be held. I need to be loved.
Is that what this is? Love?
I look up at Keller. His silver eyes heavy-lidded, his swollen lips parted as he slowly moves in and out of me. He shows me with his body what he holds in his heart and to me, it feels like love. I respond in kind, my back arching under his touch, my hands caressing the rippling muscles of his arms and shoulders, my hips lifting to meet each one of his long, deep thrusts. Keller leans on his elbows, his hands gently framing my face. He stares down at me, his expression filled with such wonder, tears spring up in my eyes unbidden. Unashamed, I let them flow down my cheeks to be absorbed by the sheets and gasp as the intensity of Keller opening his emotions takes me to the edge.
My heart stutters and my breath catches. I’m in love. In love with this dangerous, tortured, violent man. This man who is also kind, protective, loyal, and gets me like no one else does.
“Britt… I….” Keller’s eyes flutter closed and he increases the pace, his hips snapping faster, harder, his breathing becoming more labored. His cries are raw, real, emotional as he clings to me as if I’m the only thing keeping him grounded.
“Keller…” I moan, sparks exploding into fiery heat as his cock rubs a spot deep in my pussy, growing into a powerful orgasm.
Keller grabs my hands, bringing them over my head and threading our fingers together. “I’m so close, Britt. Tell me you are too.” His voice is strained but his rhythm never falters, his beautiful, muscular body undulating over mine.
“Yes. I-I… ohgod, Keller!” My breath is cut off as my body tightens, sensation overwhelming me. It tips me right over the edge. Keller shouts as I contract tight around his cock, pulsing around him. I arch back, my head pressing into the bed as my orgasm rips through me, liquid fire running up and down my body, hitting every nerve ending, and making my toes curl. Spots flash behind my eyes as I shudder and moan.
“Fuuuuck, goddamn, Britt!” Keller fucks me through my release, causing me to scream and thrash as the pleasure becomes almost unbearable. He lets go of my hands and pushes into a kneeling position between my thighs. Grabbing my hips, Keller pounds in once, twice more, shouting as he comes deep inside me. I stare in wonder at this stunning man, his muscles tight, tattooed skin shimmering with sweat, his head thrown back in ecstasy.