“Ooh, what kind of treats?”
“Ones I know you’ll like.”
I heard it before I felt it, and while I’d never actually seen one, I knew what the buzz was. Errin teased my clit with the cool vibrator and I came immediately. The sisters were right. Vibrators always do their job.
Then came the dildo. Now, I’d never had a dick, real or otherwise, inside of me, so I winced when Errin first stuck it in. I was technically still a virgin in that respect and it hurt like hell when she busted my cherry. Errin fucked me with it and then held it up to my lips so I could suck my own juices off of it. As always, I tasted delicious.
We tried everything that night. Ben wa balls. Anal beads. A strap-on dick. Everything. What an anniversary!
I’ve already planned out our next anniversary. Even though same-sex marriages are not legal in our state, I am going to ask Errin to marry me. I’m going to propose to her with a big-ass diamond and plan a private ceremony with a few of our closest friends. I might even give her a bachelorette party and hire a stripper to give her a seductive lap dance. She would get a hoot out of that.
Well, my parents were wrong. I am not going back to men because I was never really there in the first place. I love Errin, Errin loves me, and we’ll be together until the end of time. She is the only lover I’ve ever had and the only lover I’ll ever need.
The Flood—Part One: Stranger Things Have Happened
The money had truly gone to my head. What the hell was I thinking when I decided to go shopping that Saturday? Everyone had warned me to keep my behind in the house. Everyone from my mother to my best friend Shelly to the sexy broth
a on the Weather Channel. The Washington, D.C., area was expecting one of the worst floods in history, but Bailey Banks & Biddle was having an anniversary sale.
The wild part is that I had never been a big fan of jewelry when I was younger. Mostly because I couldn’t afford it. Shoot, when I was in college, I was lucky to be able to afford a Happy Meal. When I got out of college, my student loans were so piled up that I was barely able to afford cheap Chinese food. Now that I was thirty-two, things were finally looking up.
My student loans were all paid off, I was living in an apartment in Chevy Chase, Maryland, that all of my friends envied, I was cruising around in a brand-spanking-new Benz, and I had recently received a promotion and raise that guaranteed me two hundred grand a year plus bonuses. Yes, college really does pay off. No one ever believes that when they are suffering through the classes and cramming for exams. It takes a while once you get out to catch up, but once you do, life can truly be a wonderful thing.
Bailey Banks & Biddle was the jewelry store everyone always talked about at the office. In fact, they made those of us who didn’t shop there on the regular almost feel like outcasts. Thus, when I saw the ad, not to mention the ten-percent-off coupon, in the paper for their anniversary sale, I just had to see what they were working with. Saturday was the last day of the sale and I had procrastinated all week about getting there. I wasn’t about to lose out on the ten-percent-off incentive, so I climbed in my SLK 320 and headed to downtown D.C.
The roads were clear on the way down there and it started drizzling about five minutes before I got to the mall. Nothing major.
The mall was halfway deserted, and that should have been my first clue. Most of the stores had fewer than ten customers and the employees all looked panic-stricken. As I was walking past a small electronics store, I heard two men with accents discussing the weather.
“We need to get out of here now,” one of them said.
“Oh, it’s not that bad out,” the other one countered.
“But the weatherman said it’s going to be really, really bad.”
“The weatherman’s always wrong.”
The first one just shook his head in dismay. “Well, you can stay here. I’m going home. You close up.”
I could hear their conversation getting heated as I walked farther away. I was with the one that said the weatherman was always wrong. Half the time I felt like the grocery stores and weathermen were in a conspiracy. I often wondered if the weathermen got kickbacks from grocery store chains when they announced bad weather and the shelves ended up emptied from nervous shopping.
I got to the jewelry store, which was at the end of the first level, and was surprised to see that there were no customers at all and only two sales clerks. The store was decorated with helium balloons and banners announcing the anniversary sale.
An older woman who was standing by the first counter asked, “May I help you?”
“Yes, I wanted to see what kind of diamond tennis bracelets you have,” I replied. I reached into my purse and pulled out the ad. “I have my ten-percent-off coupon.”
She grinned at me. I was probably her only hope at making a sale that day and I assumed they made some sort of commission. She moved down to the next case and unlocked it. “Let me show you our top-selling bracelets. I think you’ll agree that they’re lovely.”
I took one look at the prices of the two she pulled out and said, “Hmm, I think I’ll hold off on those until I find a man to buy them for me.” We both laughed. “What do you have that’s about half that price?”
About fifteen minutes later, I had purchased a lovely twokarat bracelet, filled out all the warranty information, paid for it, and was walking out the door with it on my arm. I paused when I got to a case containing platinum wedding sets. “Oh my goodness!” I exclaimed. “These are so gorgeous!”
The sales clerk walked up behind me. “Any prospects for a proposal?”
I shook my head. “Not a one. I guess I’ve been so busy working that dating has been put on the back burner for a while. Seeing those rings makes me want to go out and find a man right now, though.”
“It’ll take a rather rich man to afford those rings,” she said.