The Other Side of the Pillow

“Everything is fine. I feel fine.”

He started caressing one of my breasts that were both fuller since becoming pregnant. “Yes, you do feel fine.”

“I want you to make love to me tonight, Tevin. I want us to try to rebuild what we had.”

“We will, and sooner or later, hopefully sooner, you’ll agree to be my wife.” He started washing my back with a towel. “I meant what I said. I want us to be married when our child is born.”

“I realize you meant it, but you do know that a lot of people have kids prior to marriage, and a lot of them never get married at all. It’s the new trend.”

“Yeah, well, fuck that. Trend or not, I was raised to be married to the mother of my children. It’s crazy to me that people will commit to making children together but won’t commit to each other in the truest sense of the word.

”

“It’s become the norm now. I’d guess that half of the mothers of the kids at Medgar Evers have never been married.”

“But I bet they’re telling their kids not to have sex outside of marriage, let alone not to have kids,” Tevin said. “I’m not sure why they would be surprised when it happens, if they provided the blueprint for doing it.”

“Well, a lot of parents are single because they got divorced.”

“I get that and you’re preaching to the choir. That happened with my own parents.”

“I know.”

The conversation was not going well. Tevin had a point. I was willing to carry his baby because I believed that he would be a great father but I hesitated to marry him. But I was no dummy either. Men could be amazing fathers and be horrific mates, or vice versa. They could be terrific mates, but fail at fatherhood altogether.

The CD switched to the next song: “Chasing Clouds.”

I stood to get out of the tub. Tevin received me into a towel and dried me off from head to toe. I had almost forgotten how tender he could be with me.

He sat on the edge of the tub so that his head was level with my chest and then started gingerly sucking on my left breast. It was tender because my hormones were out of whack and it was a little painful. But I liked the feeling just as I always did in the couple of days leading up to my period every month.

One thing was for sure. I didn’t miss my periods. Hated them. Men had no idea how disgusting and traumatic menstrual cycles were for women. And we had to go through that shit every month.

I palmed the back of his head and pulled him closer to me. He sucked harder and I moaned. He reached between my legs and started fingering my pussy. I spread my legs wider so he could stick a couple more inside of me. I started gyrating my pussy on his fingers as I swayed to the slow rhythm of the song.

Tevin stopped sucking my breast for a moment. “I’ve missed you, baby.”

I kissed the top of his head as he wrapped his arms around my waist and buried his face in my chest. “I’ve missed you, too, my love.”

I lifted his head and gazed into his eyes. “You are my love, Tevin. I realize that now. I love you and even though I need some more time before I can take it to the level of marriage, what I feel for you is real.”

“You have no idea how long I’ve waited to hear you say that, Jemistry. But I’m glad you waited . . . until you were sure.”

“Well, I’m definitely sure. I love you.”

“I love you, too.”

I buried my tongue in his mouth. His was thick, sweet, and we explored the caverns of each other’s souls.

We continued the kiss as he lifted me up and carried me to bed.

He laid me down on a pile of pillows and ate my pussy until I came all over his tongue. My senses seemed heightened because of the pregnancy. It must have been the hormones but all I know is that I could barely take the sensation. A couple of times I tried to pull away from him but he pulled me right back so he could get what he wanted. Once I climaxed for the third or fourth time—I lost count—he was ready to have intercourse.

He seemed nervous about getting on top of me so I got on top of him in a reverse cowgirl position and rode him as he grabbed my breasts from behind.

“I’m not ever letting you go, Jemistry. Never again,” he whispered.

“You never have to worry about it. Never again.”