I jumped up from the table and took his stubby hand, shaking it viciously whether he wanted to shake hands with me or not. “Thanks so much, Detective Rinaldi. I really appreciate this.”
On my way out of the room, I hesitated. It shouldn’t have mattered to me, but I had to find out. “Detective, what about Tyson? Will he be released too?”
He smirked, probably wondering why I gave a damn, since I claimed the affair was over. “Now that’s a different matter. Mr. Chase violated his parole so the PO assigned to his jacket will have to deal with him.”
In all that time, I never knew Tyson’s last name. That made me feel even more like a whore. Jeopardizing my marriage for a man I knew on a first-name basis only. What Dusty blurted out earlier ran through my mind. Gurlfriend had been telling the truth. “On parole for what?”
“I’m not supposed to divulge that information. Sorry.”
“Please!”
“Sorry, no can do.” He was ready to get rid of me and move
on to the next case awaiting his attention. “You can have a seat out in the waiting area. He’ll be coming out that way from the holding cell in a few moments.”
“Thanks again, detective!” He didn’t respond, so I closed the door and made my way back out near the booking area. The worst challenge of the horrid day was still in front of me. I only hoped I could make Jason see the light.
My optimism quickly faded the moment I saw Jason’s face. I had known and loved the man all my life and had never seen him look so hurt, angry, and disappointed. He glanced at me, and when I headed toward him, he rapidly brushed past me, almost knocking me on my ass right there in the middle of the station. I followed him outside and caught up to him at the bottom of the station steps.
“Jason!” He just kept walking, headed in the opposite direction from the Rover, since he didn’t know where it was parked anyway. He didn’t care where he was headed. He just wanted to get the hell away from me. I was right on his heels. “Jason, you’ve got to talk to me!”
He stopped dead in his tracks, turned around, and glared at me. “Zoe, I don’t have to do shit but stay black, pay taxes, and die! I don’t have shit to say to you right now!”
He didn’t say anything else, but he didn’t walk away from me either. I took that as my cue to try to explain. Even though he claimed he didn’t want to talk, I knew him like a book. He wanted me to make sense out of it to him, or at the very least make a sincere attempt. “I was going to tell you, Jason. I tried to tell you a thousand times, and after talking to Dr. Spencer today, I was on my way to tell you. I swear!”
He rolled his eyes and started walking around me like he was examining a piece of furniture. “Do you honestly expect me to believe you were going to tell me?”
He was right! There was no reason on earth he should believe me. I tried to touch his arm, but he pulled away from me. “Baby, can we please just go someplace quiet and talk? I asked Momma to stay late with the kids. I told her we were going to dinner and a movie.”
“You lied to your mother?” Then as an afterthought, he added, “I guess you’re an expert at lying though, aren’t you?”
I could’ve denied it, but the lies were going to stop. Lying had done enough damage. “Yes, I’m an expert. Jason, I’m very sick, Boo.”
“You’ve got that right! That’s the one thing we can agree on, and who the fuck is Dr. Spencer?”
We were making some headway. We were having a conversation without raising our voices and I felt maybe there was a chance for us yet. “Dr. Marcella Spencer.”
“What’s wrong with you? What kind of doctor?”
“A therapist. The one I was telling you about. The one I met a while back.” I diverted my eyes to the ground because I couldn’t look him in the eyes and continue. “She’s been counseling me about my addiction to sex.”
“What?” So much for not yelling. “Sexual addiction? What the fuck?”
The poor baby was trying so hard to have some faith in me. He had loved me just as long as I had loved him, and I could tell he was trying to grasp on to whatever might be left. “The whole thing with Tyson was nothing. He means nothing to me. You’re the only man I have ever loved, and you’re the only man I will ever love. It’s just that—”
“Just that what?” I stood there trying to figure out a way to tell him I sought things from others he would never give to me sexually. “Just that what, Zoe?”
I couldn’t do it! I would have given anything for Marcella Spencer to be there. I would have given anything for my mother to be there. I would have given anything for Brina to be there. Anybody willing to hold me and tell me it would be all right.
“Jason, I love you, and you love me, and we’ll work this out. I promise!”
“Zoe, are you even hearing the shit you’re saying? That man barged into my office and told me you’ve been fucking him for months. What am I supposed to say now? Oh gee, it’s no big deal?”
Jason sounded so sarcastic, his words cut through my heart like a knife. “Not at all. It’s a big deal. It’s a very big deal, and I understand that. All I’m saying is don’t make a final decision to throw away everything we’ve built together until you hear me out.”
“YOU THREW IT AWAY!!!!!!!” For a second, I thought he was going to hit me. “You threw our marriage and our life away for a piece of dick! Not me!”
“That’s not the way it happened, Jason.”