10 Years (Time for Love 5)

“Aww, I’m so sad that I’m missing everything.”

“I know, but you’ll be home for Thanksgiving, then Christmas … What you’re doing here is important, Gwen. For you, and your future,” my sister said wisely. Then she turned to me and added slyly, “Speaking of you and your future, it looks like you and Craig have finally gotten it right.”

I tried to suppress a grin and failed.

“It’s about time,” Gaby said, her voice becoming more serious. “I don’t know what happened between the two of you when you were eighteen, but it crushed everyone when you guys stopped being there for each other.”

“You knew?” I asked, my eyes going to where Craig was laughing at something TJ was saying to Sasha. “We didn’t want to ruin anything with the group.”

“Of course we knew, we have eyes, Gwen,” Gaby said with a chuckle. “You stopped going everywhere together, and when you called back or talked about school, you never mentioned Craig, unless it was to talk about one of his games. It was sweet that you guys drove home together, but you weren’t fooling anyone. We’ve all been waiting, and hoping, that you’d eventually come to your senses, and it looks like you finally have. Are you happy?”

“Beyond,” I replied, feeling suddenly foolish for my behavior over the past few years. I didn’t know why I thought we’d fool anyone; these were the people that knew us the best.

“That’s all anyone wants for you,” Gaby said, giving me one last embrace before we joined the others.

Chapter Twenty-Eight ~ Gwen

(18 years old)

I was sitting down on the couch at Cal and Shelly’s baby shower, talking to Brock, and trying to ignore the face that Gaby and Craig were in the room, both of whom I wasn’t talking to.

Brock had fallen in love with Victoria, and was really happy. Gaby and Scott were a serious couple, and everyone could tell that they were in love, but I still hadn’t forgiven my sister for everything that had happened between them, and I said as much to Brock.

It all started a few weeks ago, after I’d driven Aliyah and Craig back from the USC Orientation. Craig was in the backseat snoring, as I sat in the front unable to do anything but think. Luckily, Aliyah seemed pretty hungover too, so she didn’t seem to notice that I wasn’t talking much. I kept going over everything that happened in my head.

First, how wonderful I’d felt the night before, and then, how unbelievable hurt I’d been this morning.

After hours in the car I was still stuck on the same conclusion. I had to start protecting myself.

I’d gotten home at around two o’clock this afternoon, put my stuff away, changed into comfy clothes, and had been outside ever since.

I think I was grieving. Grieving for the friendship that Craig didn’t even know yet was over. Grieving for the happiness that I’d tasted, and knew I’d never have again. Grieving for the young boy and girl who’d met on the playground.

Was I being overly dramatic? Probably.

Did that mean I didn’t feel every emotion coursing through me like a million tiny pin pricks jabbing me constantly? Nope.

It was almost ten o’clock at night. I’d seen Sasha and Shelly pull up a little while ago. They were all dressed up and presumably here to pick up Gaby, but I hadn’t said anything to give away the fact that I was sitting on the porch. I could hear their laughter from behind me, and figured they were about to make another appearance.

I’d looked up as Gaby asked, “Hey, Gwennie, everything okay?”

I’d wanted to pour my heart out. Tell her everything that happened, and how betrayed I felt by Craig’s apparent memory loss, but I saw she was wearing her favorite Rolling Stones T-shirt, and her hair and makeup were done.

Then I looked to the girls waiting behind her and lied, “Yeah, I’m alright. Aren’t you going out?”

“If you need me, I can stay home,” she offered, ever the loving sister, but I didn’t want to be a burden and ruin her night.

“No, go out and see Brock,” I said, or something to that effect, then I plastered a smile on my face and faked being okay until she got in the car and drove off.

She said something about making breakfast and talking the next morning, before she left, but that never happened.

Over the next few weeks I withdrew more and more, hanging out with only Aliyah, but not telling her what happened between me and Craig.

Craig was hurt and confused, and tried to get me to tell him what was wrong, but I ignored his attempts to get in touch with me. I was trying to shield myself from people who could hurt me, and when I walked in that morning when Gaby told Mom about Brock catching her kissing Scott, I decided to freeze her out too.

If she could be so careless with Brock’s emotions, I figured she was no better than Craig, and would eventually hurt me too. Heck, she already had; she’d disappointed me by cheating on Brock … At least that’s how I saw it, and I gave her the silent treatment for months.

“Don’t freeze your sister out for me,” Brock said as I sat on the couch with him and Victoria, p