“Because I was reading his journal last night and he wrote something that you said. Verbatim, Dare.”
He lifts an eyebrow. “And what piece of wisdom was this?”
“I’m not kidding,” I snap. “He said, ‘Secrets. Everybody’s got ‘em.’ That’s exactly what you said to me. Why would you be talking about secrets with Finn? Has he told you what’s going on with him?”
Dare seems utterly confused now, and he gestures for me to come in. I hesitate.
“Please,” he urges. “I should get a shirt on.”
I follow him in and wait on the sofa as he pulls a shirt on. When he comes back out, he sits next to me, picking up my hand.
“To answer your question, no. I haven’t spoken to Finn about any secrets. Is it possible that he overheard us talking? I think we were discussing secrets here on the property one time.”
Maybe.
That actually makes sense. Finn does have a way of quietly slipping around.
I relax, my shoulders slumping. Dare stares at me.
“Did you really think Finn would get into a deep conversation with me?” He eyes me doubtfully. I shrug.
“No. I guess not. I’m just… frustrated. He’s hiding something. It’s making him worse and he won’t talk to me about it. He’ll never be able to go to college alone at this rate.”
Which means that I won’t be able to, either.
It’s something that makes me feel panicky, guilty and dejected about at once.
“I thought that’s what you wanted,” Dare presses me. “I thought you wanted to go with him.”
“I do,” I say quickly, too quickly. “I mean. Yes. I do. But at the same time, I guess I was warming up to the idea that he wants some separation. I thought it would give me an opportunity to maybe have a love life. With you, for instance.”
I feel sheepish now, ashamed, embarrassed. What kind of sister am I?
Dare lifts my chin with his finger. “Don’t feel guilty about that,” he tells me. “You have the right to a life of your own, too, you know. That doesn’t make you a bad person.”
I nod, not believing him.
He grins at me, and for a second, just one, I feel like everything is fine. “Let’s get out of here today.”
I nod immediately. “Ok. Where?”
Dare stares out his window, toward the ocean. “Out there. Where we’re boundless.”
LIVE FREE.
“Ok,” I agree.
We’re in my boat within five minutes. Me in a short sundress and sunscreen, and Dare in his dark jeans and none.
“You’re going to get skin cancer,” I stare at him.
“I’m not,” he answers. I don’t argue because I like his bare chest, and the way the muscles ripple across his shoulders as he moves. I pause on my way to the helm, long enough to run my fingers over the letters of his tattoo. His skin is hot beneath my fingertips, and the friction makes me grit my teeth.
“I’m going to show you someplace new,” I tell him, guiding the boat out of the bay and toward a small rock pier down the beach. It only takes ten minutes to get there, and I urge the boat aground so that we can step out onto land.
I hold my hand out to Dare and he takes it, climbing down next to me. We walk all the way out to the tip of the land finger, where the fingernail would be.
Dare sits, and I sit next to him, our feet splayed out in front of us on the rocks.