I didn’t answer. The revelation hit me over the head like a ton of bricks. Holy shit. Jackie was turning out to be just like my parents. She was marrying Collin and it seemed she didn’t even love him. Not if she was living with him while she became well acquainted with a just-passing-through big cock.
It was too depressing for words. Minutes passed as I stood there in the middle of the dance floor watching my sister go order my drink, then forget to bring it back to me. I saw Baldie chatting her up and despite the fact that my drink was sitting in front of her getting warm, Jackie giggled and flirted. Then his hand moved to her ass and it was well beyond flirting.
Poor Collin.
Poor Jackie. Maybe it wasn’t her fault. Maybe it was my parents’ fault for raising her to have such little regard for marriage vows and commitment. For love. For raising us that way. After all, I’d been raised in the same house. Sure, I hadn’t cheated on anyone—not yet—but I’d spent the better part of my adult life running from commitment, so maybe I was no better.
Maybe if I ever did fall in love, I’d end up exactly like the rest of my family. Cold and bitter.
Or uncaring. Jackie didn’t care about Collin’s feelings. She didn’t care about him.
God. I was like that. I had one-night-stands and walked away. I didn’t care about a guy I was with past the sunrise. Even with Dash and Jackson, I’d had fun with them in Minneapolis and walked out. No goodbye. I hadn’t cared about them or their feelings.
Deep down, I’d always known that was exactly what would happen and was why I ran from love. I’d rather live a loveless life on my own than be trapped in a miserable marriage. Or hurt someone like my parents hurt each other. Or how Jackie would ultimately hurt Collin once she had his ring.
Anger coursed through me swift and fierce. Anger at my parents for raising us to be this way. Anger at Jackie for not caring enough about love. Anger at Aunt Louise for her part in the matchmaking scheme she and her friends had hatched. I mean, handcuffs?
She knew what the rest of the family was like and should know better than anyone that I wasn’t capable of love…not that kind, at least.
I felt a comforting hand on my shoulder and another at my waist, startling me. The feel of those warm, intimate touches brought tears to my eyes. I blinked rapidly, cursing the stupid surge of emotions. No one wanted to be that chick, the one who cried at a bar. And I wasn’t even drunk. No, I was too sober.
“Want to get out of here?” Jackson murmured in my ear, close enough to be heard over the jukebox.
The feel of his beard stirred me from my thoughts. I nodded. “Yes, please.”
I let them lead me away. I should have said goodbye to my sister, but I couldn’t bring myself to face her just then. She only had interest in Baldie and besides, I’d see her at the rehearsal dinner. Maybe by then I could bring myself to talk to her without revealing my disappointment.
Dash held out my coat and as I put it on, he opened the back door. A frigid wind came down the street and kicked my hair up into my face. While the sidewalk was clear of snow, piles of it edged the road.
“Do you want to go home?” Dash asked, concern written all over his handsome features.
I shook my head quickly, an image of my parents’ bickering made me want to cry all over again. “I can’t go back there right now.”
Jackson gave me a small smile, tapped me on the nose. “He didn’t mean your parents’ home. He meant ours.”
“Oh.” I thought of how safe and content I’d been in their bed just this morning. And even though I knew it was the wrong thing to say, I told them, “Yeah, that sounds great.”
10
DASH
* * *
I worried about Avery the whole drive home. We both did. I’d been keeping one eye on the road and another where she huddled between us. I caught Jackson watching her as well, one of his arms wrapped firmly around her in comfort.
We hadn’t seen or heard everything that had gone on with Avery and her sister but from the aftermath it was clear that whatever it was, it had really shaken her. She looked distracted as she toyed with one of her rings, spinning it in a circle as we drove in silence.
“Hungry?” Jackson asked, once we led her inside.
She shrugged and when he met my gaze, I shrugged, too.
“I’ll just fix a snack.” He went into the kitchen and I heard him pulling things from the fridge. I led her into the living room, pulled some wood from the basket on the hearth and started a fire in the fireplace.
“This place is nice,” she said.
I lit a match, set it beneath some kindling, watched as it took.
“It’s so…” she shrugged as she ran a hand along the mantle with its lineup of framed family photos. Finally, she finished, “It’s so cozy.”