Thirst (The Calvettis of New York 1)

I walk to the window and gaze at her apartment. It’s where I first saw her.

The sound of my phone’s chime drops my eyes down to the screen.

Luke: I’m with dad. Take a few hours to yourself.

To do what? Worry? Pace? Think about all life’s what ifs?

I type back a response.

Rocco: I’ll be back soon. How are you holding up?

His reply is almost instant.

Luke: I’m ok but you know...I’m worried about Pop.

“Rocco?”

I turn at the sound of her voice; her beautiful throaty voice.

“I passed by your bedroom.” Her gaze darts back down the hallway. “Have you not been home since I was here?”

The twisted sheets and condom packages strewn all over the bed is proof that I haven’t slept in there in days.

“Something came up.” I don’t have the strength to spew out the diagnosis and prognosis.

Her hands fist together in front of her. “Do you want to talk about it?”

I look back at her apartment. “Let

’s talk about you.”

“About Suzanne?”

That pulls my gaze back to her. “You heard from her?”

“From Rhoda.” She shrugs her shoulder. “She told me you called her about Suzanne.”

“You should take Suzanne’s offer.”

That offer is a gift. Suzanne called me two days ago and I ignored every single one of her calls. She reached out to Jared and he filled her in on where I was. She came to the hospital, flowers in hand with an offer for Dexie in her head.

She wanted to run it by me first.

I was stunned. It’s perfect for the growth of Dexie’s business.

“You want me to move to California?” Her voice cracks. “You want me to go there?”

No. I want you to stay with me. I want you to marry me and have our children. I want to grow old with you and then a minute before you die, I want to take my last breath, so I don’t have to go through the agonizing pain that my father has.

I can’t live without her. I can’t die after her.

I can’t fucking think.

“I want your dreams to come true.” I turn to her. “That’s what I want most for you.”

“You think my dreams are in California?”

“I think you have to consider what’s best for you.”