“Is the store doing okay?” she asks.
“It’s doing okay,” I say, purposefully repeating her word. “But it’s not doing great. It’s not even doing good. For all Dad’s insistence that a personal touch and exceptional customer service will save the day, it’s hard to fight the power of the Internet and free delivery.”
She taps her nails. “We could lean into the e-commerce space. Have Caleb redo the website, let people buy online.”
“I’ve asked Caleb about five times to redo the website,” I say, sipping the champagne. “He always says he’ll get to it, but in between his paid projects and playing lumberjack…”
“But—”
“I know you want to help,” I cut in gently. “But respectfully, I’m the one who’s been managing the day-to-day. I’m the one who’ll figure out how to handle Sebastian Andrews.”
I don’t tell her that a body bag is involved in my fantasies.
“You’re right.” She holds up both hands. “You’re absolutely right. Let’s change the subject.”
“Thank you,” I say, reaching out to squeeze her hand. “How’s the renovation coming along?”
Two years ago, Alec and Lily vacated the little one-bedroom they’d rented for more than a decade and bought a three-bedroom apartment in Tribeca. Despite the new place’s fancy address and upscale building, the former owners had questionable design tastes: lots of black in the kitchen and a powder room I can only describe as construction-cone orange. The sink had been shaped like a butterfly.
To say that the renovation was an ambitious project is an understatement, but Lily, being Lily, had attacked it with a vengeance. The neon-orange powder room would be painted over with soft grays and mauve accents, the black lacquer cabinets in the kitchen replaced with white wood and glass, the stainless-steel kitchen island redone with black marble. The second bedroom would be turned into a guest room, the third into an office or a nursery.
The part of me that can’t wait to be an aunt is really curious about the destiny of that third bedroom, but I’m not entirely sure how to ask. I know they’ve always wanted kids—they’ve been trying to conceive the natural way, but they’ve also tried a variety of fertility treatments. But I also know that biology is a real bitch and that while forty-year-old women do have babies, it’s often not an easy road.
“The renovation’s great,” she says, though the smile doesn’t come anywhere close to reaching her eyes. “But I don’t want to talk about my boring married life. Tell me about your single life. Seeing anyone?”
“Trying to,” I mutter.
She smiles. “Still chasing the fairy tale?”
I lift my glass. “Still chasing.”
“Maybe Sebastian Andrews is on the market,” she says teasingly.
“Nope.” I take a generous swallow of wine. “He’s got a gorgeous girlfriend with the best hair and freckles you’ve ever seen.”
“I bet not as gorgeous as you.”
I snort. “On a good day, I’m cute, but hardly Sebastian’s type, nor he mine.”
She purses her lips. “Don’t get mad at me for going all Big Sister on you, but… do you ever think maybe it’s time to let go of your type? I’m all for knowing what you want, but if your Mr. Perfect hasn’t shown up by now…”
“He’s out there,” I say lightly, trying not to think of the very unavailable Sir.
She looks like she wants to argue, but instead studies her champagne, twisting the glass this way and that, the tennis bracelet Alec bought her for their twentieth anniversary last year sending a little kaleidoscope of light over the counter. “Have you talked to Caleb lately?”
“A few texts,” I say casually, knowing it’s always bothered Lily that she and Caleb aren’t as close as he and I. “Hey, let’s set up a video chat with the three of us. I miss his stupid face.”
She smiles. “Me too.”
I pull out my phone to text him, and a half hour later, I hug Lily goodbye, a sibling chat on the calendar for the following week.
Checking my watch, I see it’s a little past closing time and flip the Open sign, trying not to feel despondent that in the entire time Lily was here, not a single customer came in.
I turn back to the shop, and for a moment I take it in as a stranger might—as Sebastian Andrews might. I look around at the well-stocked shelves, lined with bottles that are carefully dusted every other day to disguise the fact that we don’t move all that many. The dark hardwood floors are clean, but scuffed, in a way I hope looks timeless, when in reality, there’s no room in the budget to have the wood refinished.
I head back to my laptop, intending to dig back into the dismal books with the vain hope that I’ve miscalculated something—double counted an expense or miskeyed a sale. Instead of opening my computer, I pick up the framed photo that sits on the shelf behind the register. It was taken on my dad’s birthday, just a couple of weeks before my mom was killed. We’d gone to the Jersey Shore for a beach trip. My dad had splurged on a new camera, and for this tiny moment, he had managed to get the four of us—three kids and Mom—to pause our sandcastle building, Popsicle eating, and beach reading to pose for the photo.