"What stupid shit?" I asked, sensing he needed to get it out. Which must have meant everything about him was screaming to talk about it, because no one would accuse me of being overly sensitive to sensing shit like that.
"Avi," he said, shaking his head. "When we fought, it was usually about Avi. But never in front of him. We had... we always had different parenting styles. And we could never find a middle ground with it."
"Was it her or you who seemed opposed to anything processed or cheese-covered?" I asked.
"To an extent, both of us. We both cared about being healthy, but Brit was the one with the green smoothies and checking every ingredient."
"You fought about the food?"
"Not really. We fought about the extracurriculars and the fact that Avi never really got any time with friends because of them. That morning we were fighting because she didn't like him spending too much time around my family. My mom had been coming around a lot. And she'd just called Brit to invite us to a big Sunday dinner at her place. And, of course, Enz would be there. Probably Emilio too. Maybe Brio. Just... the whole crew, I imagine. And Brit didn't want Avi around that."
"You wanted to go."
"My mom being back, she was hammering it home to me how important family was, even if you didn't want to be in the Family. I was arguing for us going. Then a car pulled up, a window rolled down, and I watched the bullets rip through her body, felt her blood splattering all over my face."
"I'm sorry," I said, feeling the uncharacteristic urge to reach out. I was not a touchy-feely sort of woman. Which was why even though I had the urge, I didn't act on it.
To that, he gave me a nod.
"I probably insulted her memory by going to Enz and demanding back in."
"You wanted to get revenge. Anyone would."
"I could have still gotten revenge if I didn't join. I know that. Enz would have seen to it. I think, just as much as wanting to make someone pay for stealing my son's mom from him, a part of me knew that without Brit, I wasn't going to be able to do it all on my own."
"And, I mean, if you weren't even in the Family, and your family was being targeted, what's the difference if you actually got back into it?"
"Yeah. And this way, I get more help. I get more protection."
"It makes sense. I get Avi's mom wouldn't approve, but it makes sense to me. And that is coming from someone not directly in the Family." At his lowered brows, I explained, "The Families seem to be holding fast to the old-school, penis-having-only members."
"Yeah, they seem a bit behind the times with that, huh?" he asked. "You gonna crash here tonight? Seems pointless to go all the way home when it's so late."
"Yeah. I figure it will be good to get used to it. Will you be home tomorrow?" I asked. "Just so I know if I should be listening for little feet or something early in the morning or not."
"I'll be around until eight, so you'll be up before I leave."
I was a general late-riser, but I could adjust.
"Alright. Sounds good. Are we on lockdown for the time being, or can I take Avi out if he wants to go somewhere?"
"Just... just nowhere open. Not the Park," he clarified.
"You'll find I'm rather... indoorsy. I like to take walks, but you're not going to find me hiking through the woods or shit like that."
"Got it," he agreed, climbing off the couch. "I'll refill the house cash for if you two go out. Just leave me a note or shoot me a text if you do. Just want to know where you're at."
"You got it," I agreed, standing up to grab the cartons of food.
"Goodnight, Alessa," he said, his deep, rich voice smooth and oddly soothing.
I felt myself freezing at the thought that accompanied his words.
I could get used to hearing that man wish me a goodnight.
What the hell was that about?
"'Night," I called back, voice a bit choked and awkward, but he didn't seem to notice as he moved down the hall and into his own room.
As I put the food away and turned off the TV, I didn't think about what Santi looked like as he stripped out of that fancy suit of his, didn't imagine water running down the indents of muscles as he climbed in the shower.
Nope.
I didn't let myself do any of those things.
Except I totally did.
I climbed into bed a while later with two dominant thoughts running through my head.
I, the possibly least qualified woman in the city, was now a nanny.
And I seemed to have the hots for the kid's dad.
My new boss.