Taming Two Warriors (Kindred Tales)

“I don’t smell anything,” she said, trying to keep herself from snarling in irritation. “Do you mind, Janice? I’m with a customer.” She nodded at the girl with green eyes who was standing there silently, waiting for the exchange with Janice to be over.

Janice’s nose wrinkled.

“But I think it’s getting worse.” She looked at Amanda’s customer. “Excuse me, Miss, but do you smell that?”

The girl nodded.

“I’m afraid so. I don’t want to be rude but it smells kind of like a cross between dog crap and rotten eggs with maybe just a whiff of skunk thrown in. Oh, and hot garbage too. I’m definitely getting some dumpster diving notes in there.”

“Yes, that’s it exactly.” Janice stepped away quickly, coming out from behind the counter. “Ugh—it’s everywhere!”

“This is ridiculous.” Amanda frowned at her. “I don’t smell anything. I’ll go get Mr. Hornfetter myself!”

She marched out from behind the counter, intending to find the sales manager and complain about Janice butting in while she was talking to a customer. Maybe she could even get the old bitch fired—that would be good. Amanda didn’t smell a thing—it was clear that Janice was just trying to steal her sale.

As she marched swiftly down the aisle, looking for her boss, she failed to notice the wrinkled noses and indrawn breaths of the people she passed. Some of them put their hands over their noses and mouths and one woman actually gagged. But Amanda was much too intent on thinking exactly what to say to get her coworker fired, to pay any attention.

At last she found Mr. Hornfetter, carefully arranging a new display of luxury lipsticks that cost an exorbitant amount. His back was to her but the overhead lights flashed off his shiny bald head, so Amanda knew it was him.

She stopped for a moment to unbutton the top button of her blouse and show some cleavage before she went up to touch her boss on the shoulder. She’d already gotten one other coworker fired this way—an awful old hag name Beatrice Johnson.

Beatrice had been getting all the shifts Amanda wanted in the middle of the day just because she had kids in school and was always whining about how she had to be at work early so she could be home in time to help them with their homework. Amanda had actually been forced to work the evening shift several times to accommodate the other woman’s schedule—and she’d missed out on some excellent parties that way.

Fortunately, a word in Mr. Hornfetter’s ear about how she’d seen Beatrice slipping high-end cosmetics into her bag had put an end to that. And Amanda had made certain to shore up her story by palming an expensive little pot of cheek stain and putting it into her coworker’s purse right before accusing her.

It still made her laugh to remember the shocked look on Beatrice Johnson’s stupid cow face when Security had asked to look through her purse and the guard had found the blush. Beatrice had stuttered and stammered and turned bright pink—she couldn’t have looked more guilty if she’d tried.

Amanda, of course, had stood by looking virtuous and sad—as though it truly broke her heart to see a fellow employee stealing. Afterwards, Mr. Hornfetter had thanked her for her bravery and honesty and she’d murmured something about just wanting to help.

After that, Amanda got any shift she wanted.

She was already planning what to say to get Janice fired too—that disgusting old bitch had been getting on Amanda’s nerves for days. But before she could tap Mr. Hornfetter on his pudgy shoulder, he turned around, his nose already wrinkling.

“Oh, hello, Amanda,” he said frowning. “What is that terrible smell?”

“What smell?” Amanda demanded impatiently. Honestly, what was everyone talking about?

“It’s just…really bad.” He shook his head. “A customer must have brought something in. Or maybe a rat died behind one of the walls. I’ll have Security look for it.” He looked at Amanda. “Now then, my dear—what can I do for you?”

“Well…” Amanda made her eyes big and woeful. “You know me, Mr. Hornfetter, I don’t like to complain about anybody but sometimes you just have to speak up, you know?”

“I suppose.” Her boss nodded neutrally. “Did someone bother you, Amanda?”

“As a matter of fact…” Amanda took a step towards him, meaning to run her fingers down his shoulder seductively. The trick was to make him think she wanted to sleep with him, though naturally she’d rather lick a toilet brush than get anywhere near the bald old goat.

But to her surprise, Mr. Hornfetter took a sudden step from her.

“I’m sorry, Amanda,” he said in a slightly strangled voice. “But I think maybe that smell is coming from you. Did you step in something?”

“What?” Amanda exclaimed. “What are you talking about?”

“Look on the bottoms of your shoes,” Mr. Hornfetter ordered. “Did you walk through a dog park before coming to work today?”