Companion 3000

Too late, Pierce, he reminded himself. You screwed up, buddy. You can wish all you want but you’re never gonna hear from her again.

He slipped out of the factory and got back to his ship, still thinking of her. He vaguely remembered promising himself that if he got out of the man-whore factory alive he’d spend some time at the Pleasure Baths on Bast Six with a few dozen friendly whores but that idea held zero appeal for him now. What he really wanted was Leita and if he couldn’t have her, he didn’t want anyone else.

Sighing, Pierce slipped the Titan Jaunter into gear and lifted into orbit. The galaxy suddenly seemed a colder, darker place than it ever had before and he was afraid it wasn’t going to get any better.

Chapter 8

“Schneider, I have got to get out of here.” Leita put her head in her hands and sighed. From outside her sealed bedroom door, the sound of creaking and thumping could be plainly heard. Just great—the Companion 2000 was humping the couch again.

Ever since she’d shot her new sex toy with the tazer pen the night Pierce had left, the Companion had been on a horny rampage. In fact, that was what Leita had named him—Horny—and he answered to it too, or any other sound for that matter. She and Schneider had taken to sneaking around the life pod as quietly as possible since any noise made Horny come running, hoping to service one or both of them sexually. Leita had lost count of the times she’d told him that she wasn’t interested but Horny wouldn’t give up. Like a dog in heat in search of something to hump, he was constantly circling, suggesting new scenarios and positions.

Her Companion had somehow gotten it into his head that Leita harbored some secret and perverse sexual fantasy that she was still too shy to share with him and he seemed to think it was his job to guess what it was so they could act it out. Leita had already turned down his offer to play “Captain Horny the ruthless space pirate and his innocent victim”, “Mister Horny the stern office manager and his naughty secretary that needs a spanking”, and “Mistress Leita the female gym instructor teaches her star athlete, Horny, a lesson with the paddle” among dozens of other suggestions and variations. She was beginning to wonder how many bizarre and twisted scenarios Horny was programmed to come up with—whoever had written his code must have been a true pervert.

Of course, there was no way Leita was actually going to tell her new Companion what she did fantasize about. Her encounter with Pierce was too fresh in her mind—it had barely been a month since she’d sent him away at tazer-point and the pain hadn’t faded yet, if it ever would. And besides, she had no urge whatsoever to have sex with Horny. Even if she had, she was pretty sure if she let him tie her up he would screw her to death in a matter of hours. So she and Schneider continued to dodge her new Companion, leaving Horny to vent his sexual frustration on the household appliances and furniture. Recently he seemed to have fallen in love with her worn but comfortable synthi-suede sofa. It was too bad because he had poked several holes in its sides and Leita was fairly certain she would never be able to get the stains off the rest of it. At least when he’d been sexing up the vacuum, the evidence of his love had been sucked out into space instead of remaining to make her life miserable.

“I have got to get out of here,” she told Schneider again. “The Galleria ship is passing close enough to our orbit to make a trip worth it. I’m going to go and get some supplies—we’re running low on a lot of things.”

“And leave me alone here with ‘Dick-boy the brainless wonder’?” Schneider demanded incredulously. “I don’t think so, Leita. He’ll turn me inside out if he gets half a chance.”

“No he won’t—just tell him your hottest sexual fantasy is to watch him hump the sofa some more and he’ll leave you alone,” Leita said.

“I still don’t like it,” Schneider grumped. “He looks at me the way you used to look at your favorite dildo before…well, before,” he ended lamely.

Leita closed her eyes briefly, trying to push back the pain. She knew Schneider had been about to say “before Pierce came” and had stopped himself at the last moment. Damn it—she ought to be over this by now.

“Look, Schneider,” she said, “You don’t like crowds and shopping which is what the Galleria is all about. And somebody has to stay in case the drone ship comes back to pick up Horny while I’m gone. The sooner we get rid of him the better, don’t you think?” She had sent a message via her web mail to For Her Pleasure, asking them to come pick up the defective Companion over a week ago. She still wasn’t sure if she would get a refund yet but at this point she really didn’t care—she just wanted Horny out of her life.