I want to smash my hands against something to redirect the pain that I'm feeling. How the hell do people do this? How do they have a child and then treat them worse than a pile of dirt? I don't understand it. I can't comprehend it because my parents have given me nothing but their love and support.
I listen as he talks on the phone to Kade. I can hear the sorrow in his voice, and now I know it's not all about Eli Benton. He's mourning the loss of all of his parents, all of them had a chance to love this incredible man, and they tossed him aside.
I promise myself that the next time I see Pauline Benton, I'm going to hug her and thank her for being exactly what he's always needed.
I saw the affection between them at the hospital the night Eli was admitted. There was as much love in her eyes for him as there is in my mom's eyes when she looks at me. I'm grateful he has that, and I'm glad she has him to lean on.
He ends the call with a brusque, talk to you later .
He and Kade have never been close. Their father's death won't change that.
"They'll be a service next week." He tosses his phone on the sofa. "You'll go with me."
It's not a question. He knows I'll be there next to him, holding his hand, holding him up emotionally if need be.
"I need to stop drinking." He scrubs a hand over the back of his neck. "I've done it before. I'm going to try again now."
I'm relieved. I've watched him drink so much scotch in one night that it would level any other man for a week. I've joked about him cutting back in the past, but he's always laughed off those remarks.
"I'll stop drinking too," I offer with a wink. "We'll do it together."
He nods. "You're the best thing that's ever happened to me. I'd go cold sober if that's what you want me to do."
I want him to be healthy and happy.
"We'll replace the liquor with sex." I wiggle my eyebrows. "Whenever you feel the urge to drink, we'll fuck."
He's on me in a flash, his hands tugging down my sweatpants. "I'm thirsty, Ad."
"Me too," I whisper into the stubble on his chin. "From behind? I love it like that."
"Strip now."
He leaves the room on a jog, his heavy steps disappearing down the hallway. I step out of the sweatpants and tug the T-shirt over my head.
"You're the most beautiful woman I've ever seen." He stops in place as soon as he's back in the living room with a condom package in hand. "My breath literally fucking stops when I see you like this. Why did I waste so much time not chasing you?"
I laugh through my tears. He can't know how deeply those words touch me. I'm still reeling from yesterday. The words of the man in the clinic, mixed with what Damaris said have played over and over inside of me all day.
I need to tell Crew. I have to hand him my secret the way he handed me his.
He moves closer, shedding his sweatpants with ease as he approaches me. His large hand fists his swollen cock. "From behind and rough, you said?"
I watch as his hand moves to my body, sliding down my navel before it disappears between my legs. "Yes, behind and rough."
He glides his hand over my core. "Your cunt is perfect. You're perfect."
I moan when he slides a finger inside of me. "Like that."
He adds another and then a third as he ups the tempo. I reach back to grab onto anything, but his arm is already wrapped around my waist.
"I'll get you ready like this." His hard cock pulses between us.
I want it now, but he wants more from me first. I drive down onto his hand, circling my hips, taking what I need.
"That's it, beautiful," he whispers against the skin of my neck. "Fuck my hand. Fuck it until you come for me."
I do, and then I bend over the arm of the sofa and come again as he pummels his sheathed length into me with words of love falling from his lips.