“Okay, l
ay back and try and sleep. Let’s let the fever try and break itself and if in a few hours it doesn’t or gets worse, I’ll give you something for it.” He began to move away from the bed.
“Where are you going?”
“I was going to work on my laptop in my office.”
“Oh.” She tried not to sound as disappointed as she felt and closed her eyes. Then she felt the bed dip and heard the clunk of his shoes came off.
“Alright, I’ll help you fall asleep but no funny business, you need your rest.” He sounded stern, she laughed as she snuggled into him.
It felt so good to be in his arms, his jacket and tie were gone and he had undone the top two buttons of his shirt. He smelled delicious and she was asleep in only minutes.
When she woke up it was to the sound of beeping. Rafael wasn’t in bed and the clock told her that she had been asleep for over two hours. She felt better, her head wasn’t pounding and her throat still ached but wasn’t as painful as it had been. The beeping drew her attention to the bedside table, it was Rafael’s phone. Wondering if it was an important text she swiped and unlocked the phone.
It was his calendar, a twinge of happiness went through her. He had a meeting scheduled for today, he’d missed it for her. Then she looked down at next week and she had wondered what if anything he was doing for Thanksgiving. It looked like he would be in Houston with his grandfather, father and Javier. There was a small part of her sad he hadn’t discussed his plans with her. A tiny evil gremlin had her swiping to see what his plans for Christmas were. But her eyes never made it that far because all she could see was, break things off with Carrie. She was pretty sure her heart stopped beating and then it started again, angry and throbbing in her head. Tapping on the day a small part of her felt relief, he had typed it in the day after they had slept together for the first time. He had been running scared, that was the only reason he had did it. Right?
She heard clattering in the kitchen, with a swipe she made the calendar disappear and tossed the phone back on the table.
“Hey, how are you feeling? Are you up for some soup and more tea? Good, here, no need to get up. I’ve had these trays forever and never used them for anything but to work on my laptop in bed. Settle back and eat.
I wanted to ask you about something. When I was looking through your cupboards I saw your mail. Why did you have a bill from Grayson and McMurry? They’re an estate law firm, why would you need to see them?”
Fuck, buying time she sipped her tea and shrugged. “No big deal, after I had to sign all the paperwork and finding out about the free insurance your company provides it got me thinking, that was all. For a long time I was out of work and then moving here to Dallas, being alone with the twins. In Austin, there was Bethany and her parents, they were great. I know if anything happened to me then they would take care of them. Then it reminded me of how hard it had been when I was suddenly responsible for two kids without financial help. My mom didn’t have insurance. If something happens to me then I want whoever takes them, probably Bethany to have help. That’s all.”
Finishing up the tea, she concentrated on the soup. It was clear he was thinking about what she said and if he bought it or not. Then he shrugged, “Those things are important and it’s good you’re thinking about them. Odd, since you’re only twenty six but you have been far more wiser than many people twice your age.
Eat your soup. It feels like your temperature broke, good. Once you’re ready, I’ll take you back downstairs so you’re in bed when the twins get home from school.
Tomorrow you are taking the day off and you’re going to sleep in and rest. No errands, no running around. Today you got well so quickly because your body is giving you warning. If you don’t rest you’ll get sick fast and you won’t get well so easily. I’ll call Linda and see if she can come in, if she can’t I’ll have a temp called in.”
Nodding, she finished the soup. She was glad he hadn’t seen through her, in all these months he hadn’t picked up her fear and which was good. There was no need to worry him over something that might not happen.
So why did she feel like if he truly cared and knew her, he’d know she was lying and detected her fear months ago?
Chapter Eighteen
“What do you mean Carrie and the twins aren’t coming to Thanksgiving? What are you going to do, wait until you two are married to introduce her to grandpa?” Javier wasn’t joking, he loved his brother but the way he was treating Carrie was so unlike him and Javier didn’t like it.
“This is my life, it’s none of your damn business.”
“Your life, but you’re clinging to ideals grandpa and mother talk about. I love grandpa, I really do. I know without him that we wouldn’t have had the care and attention we got from him instead of the revolving door nannies. I appreciate the education he paid for and I could take anywhere but I also think that maybe we wouldn’t have had to pay the price. The price you pay by working so hard all the damn time with so many responsibilities on your shoulders. The price of expectation that you are trying so hard to fit into.
You say this is your life, then why the fuck aren’t you living it that way. It doesn’t matter if mother or grandpa approve of your wife, what matters is do you? You’re the one who’s going to have to sleep with her at night and wake up to her every morning. Would you really rather do that with anyone but Carrie?” Shaking his head, his disgust was clear and he slammed out of Rafael’s office in a way he hadn’t in years.
Sighing, he leaned back in his chair and closed his eyes. Fuck, he just didn’t know anymore. The only time he could think rationally was when he wasn’t with Carrie or thinking about the way she was with him. The irrational anger he was sure would go away at the thought of sharing her hadn’t diminished as much as he’d hoped it would. His resentment of the twins had fallen away and he’d grown to miss them when they weren’t around. He still wasn’t ready to share Carrie and change things from the way they were when he loved having Carrie as his alone.
Then there was the problem that lately Carrie had seemed different. At times he’d felt her tense with worry, waking up in the middle of the night to find her staring unseeing into the darkness. Like a coward he hadn’t asked because he was afraid it was about them and their undefined relationship. Then when she got sick, he’d done what he was thought was the right thing and came home to take care of her. At first she’d been happier than he’d seen her weeks but then she’d grown quiet and there was a reserve he had never felt with her before. It was throwing him off, did he dare ask her and the twins to go with him and his family to Houston the day after tomorrow?
His father was being his usual asshole self and making everyone come to him. Matteo wouldn’t be coming in from Baltimore and Santos, his nephew, was spending it with his girlfriend in New Haven where they both lived. The plan was to drive down Wednesday and stay until Saturday. He wasn’t looking forward to the over three hour drive with his grandfather and brother, Carrie would probably want to climb the walls. The twins would probably hate it but that wasn’t a real excuse. The truth was he wanted Carrie all to himself, he didn’t want to share her with anyone, not his grandfather or father or even Javier.
Chapter Nineteen
“Come on Carrie, we promise we won’t break them. It sucks you have to work and all. My parents really miss the twins, I’ll make sure they won’t get too spoiled.”
“If you guys are sure you want them the entire four days then I won’t turn you down. I’m only worried you haven’t thought it through. I’ll talk to the twins, they’ll love it. Dang, I’m running late, I have to go. I’ll call you tonight okay?”
Damn, her hair was a mess. She didn’t have time to spend on it, a few passes of the flat iron and she decided to go with a slick bun. Oliver was waiting already dealing with Ms. Hopkins who was upset that her condo still wasn’t leasing. Oliver was explaining, again, she was asking too much. Pointing toward the door of her office, Carrie nodded and was surprised to see Linda waiting for her.