Wardrobe Malfunction (Wardrobe #1)

“It’s a sling for groin injuries. I got the design off the Internet. See”—she steps closer and takes it from me—“this part goes around your hips.” She demonstrates against herself. “And, well…this is a little bit different than the usual straps used for groin injuries, but I made a, um…well, a part for your…” She points in the direction of my dick. “And a pouch for your…balls…to support the injured one. And I also put in an inner pouch that has a cooling gel pack in it, which, of course, you can change out.”

I’m staring at her, mouth open.

She made me a cock warmer.

I’m in shock. And kind of turned on right now.

I know. I’m a sick bastard.

“And I made it extra large, you know, just in case,” she says, handing it back to me.

Taking it, I blink a few times and stare down at it.

The waistband part is made of soft elastic, and the cock part is made of a soft, stretchy material, kind of like Lycra.

This woman, whom I’ve known for less than a day, who stabbed me in the ball sack, has made me a cock warmer.

I actually don’t know what to say. For once in my life, I’m speechless.

It’s got to be a joke. Surely.

I blink and press my lips together. “Is this a joke?” I finally ask.

When I see the hurt flicker through her eyes, I know it’s not, and I feel like a gigantic asshole.

“Um, no, it’s not,” she says slowly and carefully. “You know what? Forget it,” she says, making a grab for it.

But I quickly move it out of her reach, suddenly wanting to play.

“No. It was really thoughtful of you.” I’m fighting a smile. Then, laughter snorts out of me.

“God, you’re a jerk.” She frowns.

“I’m sorry, but you made me a cock warmer. What do you expect me to say?”

Her eyes narrow on me. “It’s not a cock warmer. And a thank-you would’ve been nice. I put a lot of thought into that.”

“Yeah, I can tell,” I say drolly. “And, hang on, you stabbed me in the ball sack, and then you made me a cock warmer. What am I supposed to be thankful for? That I still have two balls?”

“It’s not a cock warmer! It’s a sling for groin injuries!” Her hands slam onto her hips.

Hips that I wouldn’t mind grabbing on to while thrusting in and out of her.

I really am a sick fuck.

It terrifies me what actually turns me on.

Turns out, women who make cock warmers do it for me.

“I don’t have a groin injury. I have a hole in my ball sack, thanks to you. And this”—I hold it up—“is a cock warmer. God, you are something else.” I chuckle.

“And you’re an asshole!”

My eyes swing to her just as she claps a hand over her mouth.

“Quite a mouth you have on you there,” I say, feeling suddenly pissed off. I’ve never known someone who could push my buttons as quickly as this chick can. “Maybe you should put something in it to stop you from cursing out like that.” I hold out the cock warmer to her. “Here, put this in there. That should help keep you quiet.”

“Ugh! Stuff you, you jerk! I can’t believe I even bothered! And have me fired because I’d rather dress a smelly tramp than you! At least he’d be more appreciative!”

She storms off, heading for the door. And I have to hold back laughter.

She’s a real pistol, this one, and I just can’t stop myself from stoking the fire one last time.

“Hey, Pins,” I call to her back.

She swings around. Her eyes are wide and blazing.

“Pins?” she says like she can’t believe I had the audacity to call her that. “God…you are…you’re just mean! I can’t believe I ever thought you were hot!”

The realization of what she just said flickers through her eyes, and her face goes bright red.

And, in this moment, with her standing here, all angry and flustered, it is the sexiest thing I have ever seen. She is the sexiest thing I’ve ever seen. And I’ve seen a lot of sexy.

“I am hot. And, FYI, this won’t fit, sweetheart. It’s too small.” I toss the cock warmer in her direction. It lands at her feet with a soft thud.

Her eyes flash with something that sets my pulse racing. “You know what? You want somewhere to stuff that cock warmer? Then, you can stuff it up your ass!”

“So, you admit, it’s a cock warmer?” I’m fighting back a smile, and I’m fighting hard.

I never knew arguing could be this fun. But she somehow makes it fun.

A cute growly sound escapes her. Her nostrils flare, her little hands ball into fists at her sides, and her chest heaves up and down, showing off those magnificent tits of hers. I have never wanted to fuck a woman more.

Then, without another word, she flips me off and swings open the door, and then she is gone.

And I burst into laughter. I can’t help it.

She’s a spitfire.

I like her.

No way am I having her fired. I have a feeling that keeping Pins around will be very interesting. Very interesting indeed.

And, no, I’m not going to fuck her. I’d have to be insane to let her near my dick. I might love sex, but I do have some sense of self-preservation.

No, I’m going to fuck with her.

Payback is a bastard…and he goes by the name of Vaughn West.

Charly

Well, it seems, I’m not fired, as Ava hasn’t said anything.