A Mystery of Errors (Shakespeare & Smythe 1)

“Look, sit down, Smythe, and stop standing there looking like some great self-righteous oak. If you will give me your attention for a few moments, I will endeavor to explain.”

Smythe obediently sat.

“Good,” said Worley, remaining on his feet, rather to Smythe’s discomfort. He did not feel that he should be sitting in the presence of a knight, but then again, sitting in the presence of a brigand certainly seemed permissible. The protocol of the situation seemed rather confusing, not to say unsettling.

“Now then,” Worley continued, pacing as he spoke, “as you have quite correctly pointed out, I am a very wealthy man. And I, indeed, have everything. Or so ‘twould appear, at least, to anyone such as yourself. I could easily sit back and rest upon my laurels, like the rest of the slothful, parasitic fools who make up the larger part of our blue-blooded nobility, but then, such is not my nature.

“You see, Smythe, I did not inherit the fortune I now possess. I earned it. Or else stole it, depending upon one’s perspective. Either way, 1 worked damned hard to get it. And I enjoyed getting it. Every damned bit of it. From my very first business venture, in which I risked every single penny I had earned since boyhood and parlayed it into my first ship, to the latest addition to my fleet, which is even now under construction in Bristol and promises to make Drake’s Golden Hind look like a river barge, I have played the game of risk and won. Well, occasionally I lost, but losing is just part of the game. And the ones who play it best are those who are not afraid to lose.

“Look about you, Smythe,” said Worley, indicating their surroundings with a sweeping gesture. “What do you see? Opulence. Grandeur. Elegance. Taste… Well, I am not so sure about the taste part, for some of this monstrosity I call a home is rather overdone, I must confess, but the point is, it is the refined and genteel residence of a knight of the realm, soon, perhaps, to be a lord, as strange as that may seem. And yet… and yet… how did I get here? How did I achieve all of this?”

Smythe simply stared at him, uncertain as to whether the question was rhetorical or not. Worley was looking at him as if he expected an answer, but Smythe had none to give. Or else, all he could do was repeat back what Worley had just told him.

“Through hard work, milord?”

Worley snorted. “Through piracy, my lad. Through piracy. I worked hard at it, to be sure, but it was piracy, nevertheless.”

“Piracy, milord?”

“Aye. Drake, Hawkins, Frobisher, the rest of them who either sail my ships or else have bought them from me… all pirates. A slightly better class of pirate, I will grant you, than your tarry-haired, rum-swilling, eyepatch-wearing, smelly buccaneer, but pirates, nonetheless. They attack ships and loot them, take them as prizes when they can and sink them when they cannot, and they are wined and dined as heroes here in England, instead of being strung up to dangle from the gallows. And why? Because they attack Spanish ships. And because the queen gets a share of all their booty. And that makes the queen no less a pirate than all the rest of them.”

“I cannot believe that you would call the queen a pirate!” Smythe said, with astonishment.

“ ‘Tis the truth,” said Worley, with a shrug. “And believe it or not, in private, she would even admit to it. Her Majesty is nothing if not practical. She always sees a thing for what it is, and not for what it should be or could be. And if she is not always honest with her ministers and courtiers and other heads of state, she is unfailingly honest with herself, which is why I rather like the old girl. She is a woman who has made her way in a man’s world without ever once submitting to a man, and she has done so with courage and intelligence, duplicity and guile, good-heartedness and malice, trickery and effrontery, and pure, unadulterated rapaciousness, God bless her great black heart, and I love her better than I loved my own sweet mother because I understand that wondrous royal bitch. She, young Smythe, is every bit as much a thief as I am. And what is more, she revels in it!”

“As do you,” said Smythe, as comprehension dawned. “Except that it sits ill with you to be so far removed from it as her. You cannot be a sea-going brigand, at least not anymore. It would ill suit a man of your position. But if you are going to be a thief, then you prefer to do the stealing with your own two hands, rather than have others do it for you. That way, at least, you own what you have done, and experience the thrill of it.”

Worley pointed a finger at him and shook it slightly. “Ah, there, you see? I knew you were a smart lad from the moment I laid eyes upon you.”

“You are most gracious, milord,” said Smythe. “But the one question which puzzles me above all others is… why me? Why take me into your confidence? Merely because you know that I could never be a threat to you?”

“In part, that,” admitted Worley. “But also because there was something about you that bespoke a difference from your usual, common sort of lout. ‘This one has promise,’ I said to myself. ‘This one, given half a chance, is going to amount to something.’ I always recognize talent when I see it. ‘Tis a gift. I felt the same sort of thing about young Marlowe when I met him.”

“Have you taken him into your confidence, as well?”

“Marlowe? Perish the thought! He, unlike you, is dangerous. He is the most rash, impetuous, demented young fool that I have ever met, for all his brilliance.”

“I should not think that he would be any more capable of being a threat to you than I could,” Smythe said.

“On his own, perhaps not,” Worley replied, “but Marlowe has some secret friends. Powerful friends. And he does not even realize how powerful and unscrupulous they are, more’s the pity. More wine?”

“Uh… Aye. Please.”

“Help yourself. Oh, hell, bring the whole decanter over. Are you hungry?”

“I could eat, milord.”

“I have some of the queen’s own venison being prepared. There is plenty. You shall stay for supper.”

“You are most kind, milord. But you were speaking of Master Marlowe and his secret friends? Why secret?”

“Because they deal in secret things,” said Worley. “Among them, murder.”

“Murder?”

“Aye. Murder and intrigue. And at the highest levels.” “The highest levels of what, milord?”

“Of government, my lad, of government. Marlowe is a spy, the wretched soul.”